TCW

What MEN wants!

2012-01-11T15:34:00.000+08:00

I believe when women think that is all we want from them, that is all they get from the relationship.. I was intrigued by the responses I received and I decided to have a chat with a few guys.. I found out that we men want more than sex in a relationship.. These are what men want from a relationship and I think we should call it the men’s list..

The main thing guys want in a relationship is a woman with brains, someone to stimulate our thought process, someone to make us analyse our decisions.. We are attracted to a smart woman.. When a woman can hold a conversation on different subjects, it’s really attractive and we want to spend more time with them.. We guys have a saying which goes “the smarter the woman, the more likely she can manage a home”.. The only problem is women like this are hard to find these days, especially when most girls seem to spend their time trying to be the perfect Barbie look alike..

The next thing we want from a relationship is someone who is affectionate.. You have to know how to use kind, nice and sweet words.. We men like a polite woman.. You also have to be gentle, compose yourself in public and be polite.. If you try this with your man and it doesn’t work, maybe you are with the wrong guy..

Appearance does matter a lot to guys.. You don’t have to be a super model, but we love and appreciate a woman who puts in effort to look good.. We are not saying wear the most expensive things, but just look neat and clean..

Men love a woman with a good sense of humour, someone who can take the stresses of life away with her charm and personality.. Men love banter and a woman who can understand the male sense of humour will get a big thumbs up!

Being down to earth is also a big plus.. Don’t pretend to be Rihanna, Gaga or Beyonce because you are not and you will never be.. Just be yourself, let your personality shine and trust me you have nothing to worry about..

Be confident! Speak your mind and let the man know what you want.. If you don’t speak we won’t know how to behave or the things that you like.. Remember, we men do not know how to read minds – if we could we would all be billionaires..

Burden

2011-12-30T01:24:00.000+08:00

If you, by any chance, feels that being in a relationship only burdens yourself, then why should you be in one right now?

In other words, you does not see the benefits of being in a relationship, nor have the attitude to be in one

You Only Have Ten Seconds to Show You’re a Somebody

2011-12-13T11:41:00.000+08:00

The exact moment that two humans lay eyes on each other has awesome potency.. The first sight of you is a brilliant holograph.. It burns its way into your new acquaintance’s eyes and can stay
emblazoned in his or her memory forever..

First impressions are indelible. Why? Because in our fast-paced, information-overload world of multiple stimuli bombarding us every second, people’s heads are spinning. They must form quick judgments to make sense of the world and get on with what they have to do. So, whenever people meet you, they take an instant mental snapshot. That image of you becomes the data they deal with for a very long time.

In other words, you must remember.. Not everyone have the time to get to know you.. So be the best person you could ever be, and be proud of it :)

Rational Pt 1

2011-09-04T16:04:00.000+08:00

Rational.. The ability to reason.. How do you know that you are rational?

Reason is a term that refers to the capacity human beings have to make sense of things, to establish and verify facts, and to change or justify practices, institutions and beliefs.. (taken from Wikipedia

To know that you are rational, you must first seek curiosity.. The burning desire to know is definitely better than any solemn vow to pursue the truth.. If by any chance, you believe that you already know, or you do not wish to know, then your questioning will be purposeless and your skills without direction.. Curiosity seeks to annihilate itself.. How glorious mystery is to be solved, and soon after, become mystery no more.. Thus, be wary of those who speak of being open-minded and modestly confess their ignorance for there is time to confess, and to relinquish your ignorance..

Personality test through colors..

2011-07-19T07:31:00.000+08:00

Main components

You are 42 % extrovert and 58 % introvert.

Independently of any order of importance :

You are able to have an in-depth thinking, you think before acting, and you know how to communicate your knowledge.

You are also attentive and cautious, you take into account the needs of others before setting up the defined goals.

Finally you are strong-willed and active, your actions are determined by your own will, by the goals you settled for yourself, and by your need to act and to move forward.

Your understanding of your environment :

At first, at 38%, you are focused on the facts and on the reality, and your decisions are determined by your perception of facts.

Then, at a ratio of 31%, you are centered on your thoughts and your actions are determined by your knowledge and your experience.

Finally, at 30%, you are attached to moral values and feelings, and you have an emotional relation with the environment.

How you assert yourself :

In your relations with others, your actions and behaviour are determined by your sensibility and that of your partner at a ratio of 55%. Then you are driven at 44% by own will and personal goals.

Your will power 44
Your sensibility 55

Also, your point of view and your decision-making are motivated by your inner conviction at 61%. Dialogue and exchange of views with others are taken into account at 38%.

Your ideas 61
Your relations 38

Finally, your inspiration and your creativity, your artistic or spiritual impulse have an influence of 56%. Also your family and personal ties interfere at 43%.

Your inspiration 56
Your family 44

~~The qualities that characterize your personality at this time :~~

Your insights.
you are thoughtful and deep, you think before getting into action and you know how to communicate your knowledge.
at 22 %

Your thinking.
you are attuned to others and you show a good emotional intelligence, which allow you to give support to people.
at 22 %

Your intellectual performance.
You are intellectual and intelligent, you wonder and you inquire before taking any action and setting your values.
at 19 %

Your emotional intelligence.
you are thoughtful and capable of listening to others, you take into account the needs of others before setting up the defined objectives.
at 18 %

Your energy.
you are strong-willed and active, your actions are determined by your own will, by the goals you settled to yourself, and by your need to act and move ahead.
at 17 %

Finally, you are creative, you know how to see beauty, you are intuitive and your inspiration comes from the inside, you are a creative person, with always new ideas, and you know how to apply them.

7 Days..

2011-07-01T16:39:00.001+08:00

inspired by a movie I just watched..

Monday I'm waiting..
Tuesday, I'm still waiting to see.. whether if you are fine..
Wednesday, you're still not here.. Not in the morning nor later..
Thursday is also empty..
Friday, Saturday, and Sunday..
None of the day that I don't miss you..
None of the day that you will come back..
to be in our old days..

The day that I met you..
The day that I was close to you..
The day that we held hands..
The day that I loved you..
The day that I spoke to you..
The day that you listened to me..
How long will it be like this.. I don't know..
How many months or years..
How many billions of our past memory..
I never don't miss you..

I've... learned...

2011-05-26T03:18:00.000+08:00

I've learned-

that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them.

I've learned-

that no matter how much I care, some people just don’t care back.

I've learned-

that it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.

I've learned-

that no matter how good a friend is, they’re going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.

I've learned-

that it’s not what you have in your life but who you have in your life that counts.

I've learned-

that you should never ruin an apology with an excuse.

I've learned-

that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that, you’d better know something.

I've learned-

that you shouldn't compare yourself to the best others can do.

I've learned-

that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.

I've learned-

that it’s taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.

I've learned-

that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.

I've learned-

that you can keep going long after you can’t.

I've learned-

that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.

I've learned-

that either you control your attitude or it controls you.

I've learned-

that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place.

I've learned-

that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.

I've learned-

that money is a lousy way of keeping score.

I've learned-

that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.

I've learned-

that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you’re down will be the ones to help you get back up.

I've learned-

that sometimes when I’m angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn’t give me the right to be cruel.

I've learned-

that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love.

I've learned-

that just because someone doesn’t love you the way you want them to doesn’t mean they don’t love you with all they have.

I’ve learned-

that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you’ve had and what you’ve learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you’ve celebrated.

I’ve learned-

that you should never tell a child their dreams are unlikely or outlandish. Few things are more humiliating, and what a tragedy it would be if they believed it.

I've learned-

that your family won’t always be there for you. It may seem funny, but people you aren’t related to can take care of you and love you and teach you to trust people again. Families aren’t biological.

I've learned-

that it isn’t always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you are to learn to forgive yourself.

I've learned-

that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn’t stop for your grief.

I've learned-

that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

I've learned-

that a rich person is not the one who has the most, but is one who needs the least.

I've learned-

that just because two people argue, it doesn’t mean they don’t love each other. And just because they don’t argue, it doesn't mean they do.

I've learned-

that we don’t have to change friends if we understand that friends change.

I've learned-

that you shouldn’t be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.

I've learned-

that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.

I've learned-

that no matter how you try to protect your children, they will eventually get hurt and you will hurt in the process.

I've learned-

that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.

I've learned-

that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.

I've learned-

that the people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon.

I've learned-

that it’s hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice and not hurting people’s feelings, and standing up for what you believe.

I've learned-

that people will forget what you said, and people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.

I've... learned...

2011-05-26T03:14:00.000+08:00

I've learned-

that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them.

I've learned-

that no matter how much I care, some people just don’t care back.

I've learned-

that it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.

I've learned-

that no matter how good a friend is, they’re going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.

I've learned-

that it’s not what you have in your life but who you have in your life that counts.

I've learned-

that you should never ruin an apology with an excuse.

I've learned-

that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that, you’d better know something.

I've learned-

that you shouldn't compare yourself to the best others can do.

I've learned-

that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.

I've learned-

that it’s taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.

I've learned-

that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.

I've learned-

that you can keep going long after you can’t.

I've learned-

that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.

I've learned-

that either you control your attitude or it controls you

.

I've learned-

that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place.

I've learned-

that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.

I've learned-

that money is a lousy way of keeping score.

I've learned-

that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.

I've learned-

that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you’re down will be the ones to help you get back up.

I've learned-

that sometimes when I’m angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn’t give me the right to be cruel.

I've learned-

that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love.

I've learned-

that just because someone doesn’t love you the way you want them to doesn’t mean they don’t love you with all they have.

I’ve learned-
that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you’ve had and what you’ve learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you’ve celebrated.

I’ve learned-

that you should never tell a child their dreams are unlikely or outlandish. Few things are more humiliating, and what a tragedy it would be if they believed it.

I've learned-

that your family won’t always be there for you. It may seem funny, but people you aren’t related to can take care of you and love you and teach you to trust people again. Families aren’t biological.

I've learned-

that it isn’t always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you are to learn to forgive yourself.

I've learned-

that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn’t stop for your grief.

I've learned-

that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

I've learned-

that a rich person is not the one who has the most, but is one who needs the least.

I've learned-

that just because two people argue, it doesn’t mean they don’t love each other. And just because they don’t argue, it doesn't mean they do.

I've learned-

that we don’t have to change friends if we understand that friends change.

I've learned-

that you shouldn’t be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.

I've learned-
that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.

I've learned-

that no matter how you try to protect your children, they will eventually get hurt and you will hurt in the process.

I've learned-

that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.

I've learned-

that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.

I've learned-

that the people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon.

I've learned-

that it’s hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice and not hurting people’s feelings, and standing up for what you believe.

I've learned-

that people will forget what you said, and people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.

"it"

2011-04-27T12:12:00.000+08:00

one.. mentioned it to me..

one.. showed it to me..

one.. taught it to me..

one.. perfected it for me..

but nonetheless, now,

I have no one to share it with..

Online meeting..

2011-03-22T10:49:00.000+08:00

Have this actually happened to you?

(Read frame by frame)

It makes sense.. Sometimes we wish that we have someone to share special moments together.. And somehow, the dream can be too good to be true..

17032011...

2011-03-17T11:44:00.002+08:00

2 more days.. and it's gonna be that day again.. Sigh..

Love is a madness

2011-03-10T00:36:00.000+08:00

Love is a temporary madness; it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision.. You have to work out whether your roots have so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part.. Because this is what love is.. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of eternal passion.. That is just being in love, which any fool can do.. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident.. Those that truly love have roots that grow towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossoms have fallen from their branches, they find that they are one tree and not two..

~Louis de Bernieres

Choosing Your Dream..

2011-03-05T13:36:00.000+08:00

Yeah.. The topic of today would be, choosing your dream..

Can we really choose our dream? It is even possible?

Actually, it is possible.. Every once in a while you wind up in a dream but somehow recognize it as a dream, and you may have found yourself able to pretty much program the dream to your specifications..

Keep a Dream Journal
As soon as you wake up from a dream, write down every little thing you can remember about it. Supposedly by writing it down, your brain recognizes certain patterns that only occur in a dream (since most dreams are immediately forgotten) and if they are on paper, you can recall them easily..

Did you know, upon waking up from your sleep, after 5 minutes, 50% of your dream will be forgotten.. And after 10 minutes, 90% of them..

Think about exactly what you want to dream right before you fall asleep.. Makes sense.. For instance you've probably fallen asleep watching MythBusters before and immediately dreamed you were flying through the air, using a giant version of Jamie's mustache as a hang glider..
The best time to have a lucid dream is either right before you regularly wake up, or right after.. Studies have shown that more people have lucid dreams when they take a nap shortly after they first wake up in the morning..

Obviously the big difference between a dream and real life is that if the Hamburglar came bursting out of your refrigerator right now and started screaming at you in Vietnamese, your first thought would be "This is a strange and unusual event that is occurring right now, and I should question my perceptions." If the same thing happens in a dream, you just go with it..

In a dream state, your mind mostly loses the ability to criticize anything that's happening because dreaming just doesn't involve the critical part of your brain.. You're all worried that you're at work in your underwear, and don't even blink at the fact that your boss is a dragon who speaks in the voice of your old middle school gym coach..

But if you change your mental state ever so slightly, that critical part of your brain can keep functioning even while in dreamland..

Personality test...

2011-03-03T12:32:00.000+08:00

Advanced Global Personality Test Results

Extraversion	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	70%
Stability	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	43%
Orderliness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	50%
Accommodation	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	63%
Intellectual	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	70%
Interdependence	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	50%
Mystical	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	80%
Materialism	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	60%
Narcissism	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	50%
Adventurousness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	80%
Work ethic	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	70%
Conflictseeking	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	90%
Need to dominate	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	70%
Romantic	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	80%
Avoidant	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	40%
Anti-authority	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	60%

Wealth	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	70%
Dependency	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	70%
Change averse	\|\|\|\|	20%
Cautiousness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	60%
Individuality	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	70%
Sexuality	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	50%
Peter pancomplex	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	40%
Histrionic	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	60%
Vanity	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	50%
Artistic	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	70%
Hedonism	\|\|	10%
Physicalfitness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	60%
Religious	\|\|	10%
Paranoia	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	40%
Hypersensitivity	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	43%
Indie	\|\|\|\|\|\|	30%

Take Free Advanced Global Personality Test
personality test by similarminds.com

according to the result... i'm a..mystical conflict-seeking person? whoaa

Life..

2011-02-20T20:32:00.000+08:00

Lifelong I lived..
The life of another..
For just one moment..
Let me live as I..

Give me some sunshine..
Give me some rain..
Give me another chance..
I wanna grow up once again..

Blaming

2011-02-16T13:50:00.000+08:00

Do u realize that.. people always blame another in events where they are powerless to change how it goes? For example, the decrease of morality in people nowadays.. They blame it on Valentine's Day.. Such is the attitude of those who are in power within political ladder..

Rather than banning a particular day, and raising objections and oppositions towards it.. Shouldn't they focus more on reeducating and improving the morals within people nowadays? To ban a specific day, just because it's not an Islamic practice, is just.. idiotic and childish..

What is Valentine's Day? V day, in short, is traditionally a day on which lovers express their love for each other by presenting flowers, offering confectionery, and sending greeting cards (known as "valentines").. The day first became associated with romantic love in the circle of Geoffrey Chaucer in the High Middle Ages, when the tradition of courtly love flourished..

Even without the Valentine's Day, will the social problems decrease? I don't think so.. V Day is just an excuse.. Immoral people will keep on doing immoral things.. Compared to a day, throughout the whole year, how many social issues occurred, involving illicit activities?

So, just because it's not an Islamic practice, they decide to ban it? I mean.. How immature can they be? Rather than striking at a cover, why not they take things more seriously, and strike where it greatly matters?

Please, open your eyes.. Stop being so damn conservative..

Biological Perspective...

2011-02-16T13:13:00.000+08:00

How could we possibly understand any of our behavior, thoughts, or actions without knowing something about the incredible organs that allow us to act, think, and react? If we can understand how the brain, the nerves and the glands interact to control feelings, thoughts, and behavior, we can begin to truly understand the complex organism called a human being...

Understanding a human mind.. In other words, psychology.. What is it actually about? How does it work? The study of a human mind..

Ego

2011-01-29T05:55:00.023+08:00

It's funny how I heard there are people would address me as desperate, Casanova or whatever crap.. They're all nonsense! Anyway, so what? I don't mind.. Call me names all they want and I'll just laugh along :)

Back to the topic.. Why do I keep hanging out with different women? It's simple, really.. I simply ENJOY their company.. Heck.. Why the hell would I go out with them if I don't feel like it.. I'm not one who toys around with another feelings as well..

There's a big difference between guy-guy talk and guy-girl talk.. Usually when a guy is talking to another guy, the ego-meter rises up.. Not every single guy out there can accept sensitive issues or relationship talks.. They need to present their "manliness" all the time.. To me, that's where they're wrong.. Putting up a block, or a mask, can sometimes be a nuisance.. People will have the tendency to mistreat or misinterpret you.. No point.. Those around you only accepted you for who you're acting to be.. Not who you really are.. Google it up.. Hypocrite vs Compromise..

What I've written below is some of the points I took out from a book, which has some interesting points for talking with women...

The basics.. For starters, you need to actually LIKE women.. How can you expect them to like you if you don't really like them? And I'm not talking about physical interaction.. You need to like how they talk, how they act and especially what they are.. You have to pretty much looking for the best in women..

Listen guys, you can't be going around saying they're gold diggers, they're all liars, they're going to cheat on me anyway.. Women follow your lead.. If you believe them to be that way, then they will be that way.. Think the best of what they can offer you..

Remember, there are men and women with hearts of gold.. Just because you met with one asshole, doesn't mean every single of them is the same!

Offline...

2011-01-29T05:53:00.000+08:00

For some reason, I don't feel like talking to people who always appear offline or is in invisible mode..

Rather.. They want to be "hidden" from everyone.. Thus, that's exactly how I'm gonna treat them.. "hidden"..

Nuff said~

Dreams

2011-01-13T10:57:00.001+08:00

Dreams.. Dreams are a succession of images, sounds or emotions that pass through the mind during sleep.. The content and purpose of dreams are not fully understood, though they have been a topic of speculation and interest throughout recorded history..

Have you recently had a weird dream? Very weird but it seemed real at the same time?
This has to be one of the weirdest dream I've had over the last few months.. It feels as if the dream had actually happened.. But in the end, it's just a dream...

I'm a Gorilla =_=

2011-01-09T15:31:00.002+08:00

taken from http://animalinyou.com/test.php
Gorillas are strong, unpolished individuals with a gruff exterior that conceals their soft and chewy center. They are capable, happy-go-lucky individuals with a disarming naivet. Maybe a little hairy with a tattoo or two too, they are unpretentious and engaging creatures who brighten everyone's day with their enthusiastically warm greetings. They pay little attention to their physical condition and can even be a bit of a slob. With this tendency to be untidy, a gorilla isn't one to recycle or pick up after itself.

Even with the gorilla's warmly gruff exterior there remains an underlying sense of menace that percolates throughout its personality. Though it is built for physical confrontation, it's difficult to imagine a gorilla actually inflicting bodily harm. However, when the gorilla or its family is threatened, the transgressor quickly realizes their mistake. Its body hair standing on end and large frame at full height, the gorilla will never back down from a fight. In a child-custody battle it's better to negotiate an up-front peace with a gorilla rather than endure a prolonged and bloody battle.

Gorillas are intelligent but not overly motivated. When young they avoid formal learning, and as an adult their intelligence manifests itself as street-smarts. They have the talent and problem-solving skills to be excellent mechanics, plumbers or repair people.

Their career, however, takes a backseat to the pursuit of recreational activity and they will rarely reach great heights in business. However, if they're lucky enough to find a job that incorporates fun and physical prowess - such as a personal trainer or professional wrestler - they can certainly rise to the top of their field.

Gorillas' appreciation for the good life puts them in good stead for careers in the service industry, including the hotel and restaurant businesses, and customers appreciate a gorilla's gruff but can-do attitude.

Gorillas are unmotivated by money, and they avoid strenuous physical exertion in favor of spending their leisure time at play. Drawn to social groups, the classic gorilla scene is a group of Hells Angels revving their bikes, mimicking a gorillalike chest pounding and roaring.

Ingenious!

2011-01-06T09:03:00.001+08:00

This is really ingenious! I salute the student who made this essay..

If you're wondering what's the song, here it is.. Enjoy!

What Can You Learn From K-Dramas

2010-12-29T00:44:00.001+08:00

1. Men who are hawt and rich fall in love with vulgar, outspoken women.

2. If you are a girl and have a best guy friend, he’s definitely in love with you.

3. Brothers/best friends/schoolmates/enemies always love the same girl.

4. You’re allowed to make U-turns anywhere in Korea. And there’s never traffic (or a single vehicle) on the side you want to turn to.

5. You get to run out of a restaurant without paying the bill. All you have to do is slap someone and storm out in tears.

6. Everyone has cancer.

7. You’ll get a flu/cold/fever after getting caught in the rain for 5 minutes.

8. When you’re sick, your boyfriend carries you on his back and races to the hospital. He hasn’t even heard of taxi/buses/hitching a ride.

9. Somebody gets into the pool/ocean with their clothes on.

10. If you’re rich, you’re an bubble gum.

11. If you’re poor, you’re an angel.

12. Your brother is a retard. If said brother is a real (blood-related) one, he is a lazy, stupid, irresponsible bum who exists by leeching off you. He’s not even handsome.

13. You’re not studying hard enough unless you get a nosebleed.

14. If you have a nosebleed, it’s most definitely cancer. And you have no money to pay for the surgery that’ll save your life. And your liver is missing. The doctors are not sure where it went, but it’s making your cancer progress faster.

15. You always order orange juice or coffee at a cafe. And you never drink it. EVER.

16. If two people are talking confidentially, they will leave the door of the room ajar so that a third party will eavesdrop on the conversation.

17. You go to America and you come back miraculously successful. You go to England and you come back amazingly fashionable. You stay in Korea and the only thing that’s changed is your hairstyle.

18. And you come back to Korea because you have cancer.

19. Everyone goes to the same hospital no matter where they are.

20. Even if you’re poor and can’t eat, you never wear the same clothes twice.

21. If you play a poor kid, you always have dirt on your face and your hair is always messy.

22. If you’re saving someone from being hit by a speeding car, you’ll push them out of the way and wait for the car to hit you instead.

23. Everyone has a long lost sister/brother/twin.

24. If you don’t want to answer your lover’s call, you can’t turn it off. You’ve got to take out the battery.

25. All Korean men can drink hard, smoke long, sing well and play the piano. Usually all at the same time, at the same restaurant that has a piano. The girlfriend doesn’t know this until she sees him playing the piano at night.

26. If you’re in a relationship, you must, at one point, leave the country and have your lover tearfully come RIGHT before you board the plane (vice versa applies as well. You can be the chaser.) 60% of the time you meet each other, and 40% you’re roaming around in circles in pass each other about 6 times. But you don’t see each other.

27. If you’re getting off a plane, you’re always wearing sunglasses.

28. All guys wear hideous tracksuits zipped up to their neck. Even if they’re only doing jump-roping.

29. Girls will always storm off because they’re mad. The guy will stoically grab them by them arm and swing them back – by magic, not dislocate their shoulders.

30. If you hit your head in a traffic accident, you might lose your memory. But don’t worry, you will get it back when you hit your head a second time.

31. Surprises ALWAYS backfire.

32. There will be situations in an elevator and in a toilet. In the elevator, you gotta get stuck with the bastard you’re trying to avoid. In the toilet scene, there’s a high probability you get caught by that bastard you’re trying to avoid.

33. Or most likely because you’re in the men’s toilet.

34. Unless you’re fabulously rich, your in-laws will always hate you.

35. So will your sister-in-law.

36. Your brother-in-law might have a crush on you.

37. There are only 2 ways to kiss. You either press your lips against theirs with your mouth completely shut in a long and comfortable kiss, OR you devour the other person and suck their soul out. In both instances, the world spins.

38. If a car ever breaks down or runs out of gas, it will happen on a small rural road with no other traffic, late at night. The area will also have no cellphone coverage, and you gotta walk the whole 10 miles back to civilisation in your 5-inch heels.

39. If you want 2 rooms in a hotel, only one will be available, and that one room will only have one bed.

40. You’ll get pregnant the first time you have sex.

41. You’ll get pregnant if he kisses you on the forehead.

42. Hell – you’ll get pregnant if you hold hands.

43. If you overcome great obstacles to be together, one of you must die. Probably due to cancer.

44. A guy and a girl on a bus must sit in the rear next to the right-hand window. A lone girl/guy sitting at that spot will reminisce about the time when he/she did have someone sitting beside him/her.

45. One man can kick the butts of 6 gangsters, especially when they all stand in a circle and attack the guy 1 by 1. When each of them get their butts PWNED, they wise up and attack the guy at the same time. Then the guy will get pulverized and bleed out onto the dusty concrete floor of the empty warehouse they found to fight in. And the girl will have watched this the entire time, screaming in horror. Instead of calling 119, she’ll just watch and cry. But it’s okay. Because the next day the guy will be fine with a few random bandages and a few scars on the face. But never a black eye.

46. Good girls don’t drive cars. Bad girls do. Well, a good girl just might drive, but she will do it so badly it’s a wonder she was ever given a license.

47. Rich people live in mansions surrounded by brick walls. The others live in shacks atop high buildings in downtown Seoul, or in hillside slums on the outskirts of the city.

48. Korean schools and universities suck. To study anything serious, you must go abroad.

49. If you study in the States (preferably Harvard), you are one of the top students and you can speak perfect English (as assumed by the reactions of those around you). Why the rest of the world OUTSIDE the TV can’t understand a single word uttered in your melodramatic voice is beyond me.

50. For one reason or another, a guy comes out of the bathroom naked/chest bared. Utterly shocked, you cover your eyes while screaming and pointing at him, while the guy screams along and covers his… nipples?

Like? or Want?

2010-12-14T16:32:00.001+08:00

What behaviors can YOU implement that are known to make the women that YOU DESIRE MOST to want you?

First of all, it’s time for a small but important distinction. Be aware: there is a difference between LIKING and WANTING.

A woman can like you perfectly fine, and still not be ATTRACTED to you. (Hint: this is called ‘friendship’.)

Unfortunately, a lot of guys TRY to create ‘attraction’, when in fact, what they’re ACTUALLY doing is creating FRIENDSHIP.

Many guys attempt to do things for a woman which (he thinks) will make her want him …

… but which, in actual fact, do nothing but broadcast his COMPLETE lack of perceived control over the situation, his DESPERATION to effect a certain ‘end’, and his cluelessness about ‘how attraction works’.

Such men include those who preface a conversation with a female counterpart with the words, ‘Hey, can I buy you a drink?’ and ‘You’re pretty’ …

… as well as guys who assume the ‘therapist’ role (hearing all about the ex, the guys who’ve ‘done her wrong’, and about the guy she’s currently seeing) …

… as well as guys who ROLL OVER and play ‘dead’ for a woman (being the chauffeur, buying her stuff, putting up with weird behavior and temper tantrums, and generally pandering to the idea that SHE is in control and YOU are supplicating to her.)
Fortunately, there are many women out there who have too much self-respect, compassion, and BETTER OPTIONS than to encourage that kind of behavior from men …

… but on the other, less-fortunate hand, such women DO exist who WILL accept (and in fact, blatantly orchestrate) such behavior … some, who even EXPECT IT.

Such women are toxic, and you would do well to avoid all interactions with them. Sex is not a valid currency in the mind of ANY man who has a modicum of value.
So here’s the point: those are the kind of women who ‘like you’ (or appear to) rather than actually WANTING YOU.

(They are also, often, the kinds of women who believe that ‘men are rats’, that they’re only out to ‘get one thing from a woman’, and that your funds are a valid exchange for such shreds of time and fleshliness as she’s prepared to throw your way.)

… and let’s be honest here. Most of the time, that fleshliness is REFERRED to often, but rarely actually MATERIALIZES. So she’ll hint, infer, and otherwise make you THINK that you’re maybe going to get a ‘reward’ for all your troubles … but it almost NEVER actually HAPPENS.

There is an important lesson here: if you want to make a woman WANT you, you have got to be in control of yourself, and not seem DESPERATE.

The easiest way not to seem desperate is, of course, to actually not BE desperate. And the best way to genuinely avoid desperation is to actually HAVE OPTIONS when it comes to women and dating.

If you ever catch yourself feeling as though you’d ‘do anything’ for a woman just to have her hang around, she will SENSE it and be repelled.

Why?

Because women don’t like weak, needy men who are OK with receiving poor treatment simply to bask in her presence.

Power corrupts. And absolute power corrupts absolutely.

So lesson one: don’t give away your power. Don’t supplicate. Don’t beg. Don’t be desperate. For now, put your attention on the necessity of not ‘faking’ anything (i.e. not having to PRETEND not to be needy or desperate, while all along your heart’s hammering away and your palms are sweating because this is Your Big Chance)

… and of actually HAVING OPTIONS.

A few solid guidelines:

Don’t be on call for her.-

Don’t drop everything for her.-

Don’t wait for her to validate you.-

Don’t offer to purchase anything or expend any resources in order to talk to her - or see her. (If taking girls out is something you already do for fun, then fine. But if you’re doing it because you want her to ‘like you’, then consider that your first red flag and drop that behavior like a hot potato.)

Don’t be the one she calls ONLY when she ‘needs something’. -

Be a man, not a puppy-dog. -

But enough with the doom and gloom. So now you know how to make a woman ‘like’ you as opposed to ‘want’ you …

… so how do you flip the coin? How do you make her WANT YOU?

Is it looks?

Is it wealth?

Is it confidence?

Is it power?

All those things are part of it, but they’re not THE SINGLE MOST FUNDAMENTAL THING.

I want you to think deeper than what everyone else is telling you. Think deeper than ‘conventional wisdom.’

What is the single most fundamental thing that a woman wants in a sexual partner?

Think about it…

What’s the one thing she HAS to have?

I can tell you straight off that it isn’t looks. There are plenty of average-looking guys with beautiful women in their lives.

And quality women don’t tend to be overly impressed by wealth.

Confidence is definitely a big one, but it’s still not ESSENTIAL a full 100% of the time, with 100% of women.

… so WHAT IS IT?

Here goes: the MOST important thing that a woman needs in order to WANT YOU is …

… that you are a MAN.

"I need you"

2010-11-30T17:55:00.000+08:00

Sometimes, how nice it would be if the person you care about, says that they really need you.. You'll feel the importance, the significance of yourself in their life..

It would definitely bring the person a very big smile, when you say that you need them.. Think about it, that person might be sad, annoyed, or even angry, but then, when you, someone important to them, says that you need them, it would definitely cheer them up..

However, do keep in mind that, if you do this to almost everyone, it might have a reversed effect.. Especially if you do it to the wrong person.. Never and NEVER do this to your one-sided love.. At least be sure that they don't already have someone else in mind...

Good luck in making someone's day brighter ;)

Anxiety kills ;)

2010-11-25T09:26:00.000+08:00

Before sharing with you the secrets to becoming a vibrant, supremely self confident person who is ultra attractive to the opposite gender, I have a few questions that I'd like to ask you....

Have you ever seen someone from across the room that you really like, or who you'd really love to meet.... but were too overwhelmed by fear and nervousness to go over and start a conversation?

Have you ever felt like you don't deserve the kind of person that you are REALLY attracted to, and as a result always settle for second best?

Have you ever felt yourself shaking with self-consciousness when you are talking to someone that you've got a crush on? Lost your words? Can't be your best self?

Have you ever been in a relationship where you got emotionally insecure and ended up driving your partner away by your clinginess and insecurity?

Have you ever fallen in love with someone before you've even dated them and got jealous and upset when they go out with someone else?

When you're not self confident, then you get nervous and act differently at times when you feel stressed or need to be at your best.. For example on a date, or when you talk to someone you're attracted to..

If your confidence betrays you at these vital times, then you may well struggle to make your life turn out the way you want it to.. Confidence is attractive, and without it, it's difficult to attract a really good catch.

Why?

People base their assumptions of you on what they know of you. That's why first impressions can be so hard to change.. If that's all they know of you, then as far as the other person is concerned, that image they have in their head of you IS YOU..

So if you meet someone you are attracted to and act nervous, fumble your words, and run out of things to say.. Then as far as the other person knows, you are someone who is nervous, fumbles their words and runs out of things to say..

Of course a little nervousness with a smile can be endearing and can even help you, but if you can't let your best self shine through soon and if you end up getting so nervous that you just want to get out of there, then it's hard to see that person you like ever be attracted to you..

Also, it's really unfortunate that people may assume from your shy or nervous behavior that you simply don't like being around them.. They pick up on your discomfort. They may end up becoming quite negative towards you as a result, because they think that you've rejected them first—when in reality you just didn't know what to say or do..

Reasons? Simply because...

Anxiety that you may never be able to attract and keep the kind of person that you REALLY want. If you've ever felt this kind of anxiety then you'll know PRECISELY what I am talking about.. It plays on your mind all the time..

Anxiety that the person that you want isn't interested in you, or is interested in someone else. If you've ever been through this kind of mental struggle, then you'll probably also be aware that it often becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy that could well turn out far different if you didn't create all this internal tension by playing these mind games with yourself.. Find out how to stop these anxious thoughts and how to replace them with positive ones!

Anxiety about what to say next. Do you ever suddenly freeze up when you're around a person who you're attracted to? Perhaps you get the exact opposite and talk too much, too fast.. Either way, be yourself and wash the anxiety away when talking to the opposite gender..

Anxiety about what you look like. Do you worry that you don't look attractive enough to attract a hottie? Do you feel like you can't attract the person of your dreams until you lose x pounds? Or until you get a tan? Feel great, exactly as you are, because attractiveness comes from within first!

Love is like a Drug?

2010-11-25T08:16:00.001+08:00

Love of family, and platonic love, are not so susceptible to scientific probing.. But since my first disastrous infatuation with a girl I believed to be my eternal soul mate, I've been convinced that romantic love is a profoundly physical rather than spiritual phenomenon..

In romantic love, our neurons and our hormones, our brains and our blood pressure, our stomachs and hearts, are in a state of upheaval.. And if we check out the behavior of our close primate relatives, we can detect links between human bonding of the romantic love type, and evolutionary survival pressures.. In fact, there's no area of physiology, or behavioral and evolutionary biology, that doesn't boast an explanatory claim to romantic love..

The feeling that romantic love is akin to being "besotted" lies deep in western folk memory.. From the ancient Greek myth of the centaur Nessus and his dangerous love potions, to E M Forster's lovesick Maurice's complaint that he is "drugged", our forebears have characterized romantic love as a potent substance.. But is it generated within, or outside, the body? Many of our ancestors cited external influences: drugged arrows, spells, planetary forces, charms, potions..

A medieval recipe for a "true-love powder" states: "Take elecampane, the seeds and flowers of vervain, and the berries of mistletoe.. Beat them, after being well dried in an oven, into a powder, and give it to the party you design upon in a glass of wine and it will work wonderful effect to your advantage.."

But Galen, the 2nd-century Greek "prince of physicians", insisted that the affliction was purely a matter of internal chemistry.. It's what happens, he asserted, when the crucial four bodily fluids, or humours — yellow bile, black bile, phlegm and blood — get into a muddle.. For Galen's followers, right down to Robert Burton, author of The Anatomy of Melancholy, the theory of humoralism held good.. Galen was eventually displaced by 19th-century theories of cell biology, but modern physiologists nevertheless share his broad conviction that romantic love is induced by powerful natural bodily chemicals.. In our own day, the favoured chemical explanation focuses on a molecule called PEA: phenylethylamine, a kind of natural amphetamine that revs up the brain and the central nervous system.. PEA causes the experience of euphoria, hyperventilation, increased heart rate, dilated pupils, and secretions of odors that can seduce an unsuspecting love object.. The eye of the chemical storm is in the brain..

The brain in romantic love resembles a huge geological and meteorological event: earthquakes, cyclones, tsunamis.. It's as if the ecosystem of the lover's brain, the pulsing grey-blue-green planet in the skull, suffers a drastic depletion of the protective cortical ozone layer, triggering neuronal global warming with consequent atmospheric storms..

The notion that reason goes to pot in romantic love fits with a popular mind-brain theory first proposed in the 1970s.. The outer brain, or cortex, which evolved late in evolution, is associated with rational thought and intelligence.. The midbrain, known as the limbic system, regulates the emotions.. But there's a deep inner core, located at the final bulb where the spinal cord enters the brain where lurk our darker, primeval, instinctive behaviors of territoriality, mating and reward-seeking..

But whether the nature of romantic love is revealed by nurture rather than nature, by evolution rather than hormones, psychodynamics rather than behaviourism, there are significant lessons to be learnt from the science of statistics.. Divorces, steadily on the increase these past five decades, now run at a rate of more than 50% in the highly concentrated residential districts of the southeast of England. The figures do not include the failed heterosexual partnerships that never reached marriage, nor homosexual partnerships, but the statistics reinforce the message that we should be sceptical about romantic love as a prelude to lasting love.. And yet, statistics also reveal that, despite the scepticism, marriages are on the increase, at a rate of about 2% per annum.. The notion that romantic love is worth it, that it can transform to permanent attachment, is not only far from dead, it is evidently alive and well and thriving..

At a conference on love held about 30 years ago in the US, the delegates agreed that romantic love should be defined as "a cognitive-affective state characterized by intrusive and obsessive fantasizing concerning reciprocity of amorant feelings by the object of the amorance".. That, of course, is the problem of seeking to understand romantic love in clunking scientific language.. Science tells us much that is interesting about love.. But to describe what it is really like to fall in love, subjectively, personally, and to understand why we continue to embark on its exciting, as well as painful and hazardous, journey, we must turn to other kinds of human discourse: poetry, fiction, memoir, and real-life experience..

Lovesick?

2010-11-25T07:36:00.000+08:00

So deeply affected by love as to be unable to act normally.. I awake every morning, thinking on her, having dreamt of her all night, the pain of separation searing your heart every time a site or smell brings back the memory of your last encounter.. Daydreaming, drawing hearts in the sand, constantly thinking "I wish she's here so I could share this moment" even when pulling weeds or walking around.. The consuming fire within the heart for even one more moment with ones love that defies rational thought, knowing full well, one moment would never be enough, yearning for eternity together..

The close relationship between the two might help modern day doctors in both their diagnoses and treatments..

I feel that lately, I've been quite fatigued.. Even though I had a total of 9 hours of sleep.. It maybe due to the hypoglycemia but then, does hypoglycemia cause fever? I've done some googling and here's some of the interesting facts I've found...

Lovesickness has its own symptoms, such as insomnia, depression, loss of appetite, loss of interest in everyday life and work, obsessive thoughts, mental intrusions and a frequent inclination to cry..

Then comes the bigger question, am I really lovesick? I'm not saying that I'm thinking of her all the time, but there are times when my mind would fill up with unanswered questions.. And they are not entirely about her as well!

Actually, it might be better this way.. I know I just couldn't sit around and do nothing.. As a question pops up in my mind, if they are not other people related, I would just simply google it up, and find deeper understanding about it.. Once I understand what it is all about, my worries, my insecurities are gone..

Here's some of the symptoms of Lovesickness...

Clammy Hands

Clammy hands and dry mouth are a sign of being love sick.. The body's nervous system goes haywire--too much moisture in the hands, too little moisture in the mouth..

Preoccupation

When the lover is not nearby, the love sick person will feel bereft, depressed, moody, tearful, anxious and preoccupied.. The love sick person will experience loss of appetite..

Rapid Heartbeat

Upon seeing the lover, rapid heartbeat is usually paired with a rush of emotion in the chest.. The pumping of the heart can cause blushing in the face and neck..

Confusion

Confusion may occur when the lover is nearby.. Stuttering, staring and clumsiness are all aspects of this symptom..

Symptom Duration

Despite its intensity, love sickness is a passing state of mind, lasting anywhere from a few days, to a few months.. It's difficult to retain the intense level of emotion that love sickness awakens in the body--usually the feelings lead the lover to either express her feelings and reduce the anxiety, or as time passes, the feelings lose their power as the reality of getting to know the real person takes away from the fantasy..

Doubts...

2010-11-22T08:40:00.002+08:00

I've been having insecurities for the last few days.. My instinct is saying to let go... But my heart is saying to stay.. Even though it's hurting... As for my mind, it's been saying.. I have to follow this through the end.. Words I've said.. I must comply.. I'm not one who would simply make promises and giving up before it has really ended.. My principle.. My beliefs.. And my pride..

Though my heart aches so much, I still can't stop thinking about it.. I would really like to make things work.. Nothing is as important anymore..

Arghhh.. Being an optimist can sometimes be a pain in the ass.. Despite that, I know that things will work out in the end.. one way or another...

Helping Hand..

2010-11-21T00:45:00.000+08:00

I've noticed that my last post was about getting over an ex.. But then, most of it is only applicable when the breakup happened to you.. Now, what would you do if a friend is having trouble getting over an ex? More importantly, what if that friend is someone you admire.. Someone you love? What should you do then?

The answer is out there.. And I intend to find it...

Relationships.. Heal Or Leave..

2010-11-19T14:14:00.003+08:00

It very easy to get into a relationship, but when the relationship begins having major challenges, goes sour and you don't know what to do, then your decisions become much more difficult..

Whether you decide you want to stay with your partner and begin working to revitalize your relationship or to move on, here are some strategies and ideas to help you move forward in a more empowering way..

It seems that everywhere you look, many long-standing relationships and/or marriages are troubled or dissolving.. If you're like most people, when this happens, you find yourself stuck in thinking about the past, wondering what went wrong, and unable to move from the pain of the relationship.. It doesn't matter whether you leave, stay or were left-one of the best pieces of advice I can give you is to leave the past behind and not carry old “baggage” into the new life you would like to have..

We have each been through the break-up of a major, long-standing relationship and have come to appreciate those times in our lives- even though both divorces were very painful.. We each, in our own ways, learned how to begin healing by not burying our feelings and to start moving toward what we wanted most in our lives instead of living in the past..

If you've been living with the question of whether to stay or go for any length of time you have undoubtedly experienced a great deal of painful feelings surrounding the challenges of this relationship..

It's important to learn from the past but it's equally as important to not stay stuck in it.. Whether you have decided to stay or leave, you have to move forward as if you are starting fresh with a brand new relationship.. What I'm about to share with you are the five keys that are the most important to help move you from your past to healing and start you on your way to creating a new, more vibrant life..

Key 1: Never look at a relationship (or anything else) that hasn't so far worked out as a failure

Often it's the seed of a current or past “failure” that fuels you to the very success that you've always dreamed of.. It sounds trite, but there's always something you can learn from every experience..

Past relationships give you a clearer picture of what you want and what you don't want in a relationship if you take the time to examine them.. It's the power of contrast that living in an unfulfilling relationship may give you..

After a break-up, one should realized what this relationship had taught him/her and that it wasn't a “failure..” This relationship had helped him/her to define the type of partner he/she would really resonate with--someone who was on a similar spiritual path, someone she could have a deep connection with, and someone who loved to be with groups of people..

What I've learned is that if a relationship isn't working out, it is not a bad thing or a failure that our society likes to label it.. It just may be that you have learned what it is that you were supposed to learn by being in a relationship with that other person and it's time to move on to other “lessons..”

I'm not suggesting that you take your relationships lightly and throw them away at the first sign of conflict--Quite the contrary.. What I'm saying is that the purpose of all relationships is to help us to grow.. Even the relationships that are the most troubling to us can be gifts in learning more about ourselves.. Those people who really get under our skin can be our best teachers.. I suggest that you look at all of your relationships as growth experiences and move forward consciously by learning from them..

Here are some questions to help you with this:

* What did I learn about myself by being in a relationship with this person?

* How did it help me to move forward and heal, learn and grow?

* What new beliefs did I take on or let go of as a result of being in a particular relationship?

Key 2: Turn from the past and look toward the future … YOUR future

Sometimes after a separation or during the process of rebuilding a relationship, we find ourselves dwelling in the past, our thoughts consumed with that other person and past events.. You will begin to heal when you start thinking and writing about what you want for your life--today and in the future..

I've found out that the key to moving forward in your new life is to figure out what you want your new life to look like and you can start small-but start..

Here are some ideas that can help you with this process:

* If you or your partner left your relationship, remove photos of your past partner that are prominently positioned in your house (You don't have to destroy them.. Just put them away..)

* If you're staying in the same house that you and your partner shared, move the furniture and put some different things on the walls.. Different inexpensive items that are “you” can really help you to move from your past into your present and future.. Even if you are revitalizing your relationship, clear out some clutter together and you won't believe how that will help..

* Sign up for a class that will get you physically active-yoga, Tai Chi, martial arts, aerobics, swimming, tennis, dancing.. Get your body moving! When you get your body moving, endorphins are released into your bloodstream that help you to feel more positive and uplifted..

* If you are on your own, find a support group-people who will not support you in being a victim or rehash why you left, but groups who will stimulate you into new thought and new ideas..

* If you are revitalizing your relationship, taking a class together at your local university, church or community center can help steer you in new directions together.. Also thinking about setting and implementing new goals for yourselves and for your relationship will create movement which in turn creates healing..

Key 3: Take 100% responsibility for the relationship -no more and no less

When a relationship experiences challenges, very often we want to assign fault and blame.. When you are in a healthy relationship with another person, both people are equally responsible for the relationship.. If a relationship isn't working, the same thing applies.. No matter who appears to be at fault when challenges come up, both people are responsible..

If you are taking more than your share of your responsibility for the relationship not working out the way you would like, you are being a martyr.. If you take less than 100% responsibility for the relationship not working out, you are being a victim.. You can only heal when you have let go of “fault” and “blame” and focus on letting go of the past and how you can do it differently in the future..

This can be a very difficult process if you are hanging on to the need to be right, anger, judgments and unexpressed resentments- especially if you feel your partner hasn't or won't take any responsibility for the health of the relationship..

Forgiving and forgetting may seem to be beyond reality for you now.. It's like if someone says to you, “Don't think of the color blue” “Don't think of the color blue” “Don't think of the color blue,” no matter how hard you try, you probably can't stop visualizing or thinking about the color blue..

The same thing happens when you try to “forget” a negative situation that has an emotional charge to it.. No matter how hard you try, you just can't seem to do it.. We believe that instead of forgiving and forgetting, you have to forgive and let go..

Many people wanting to know how they can forgive when they have been wronged--a spouse cheated on them; they've been abused in one way or another; or maybe their feelings have been hurt and they don't feel loved or valued.. What we can find is actually that the process of healing oneself when a relationship has ended or when a relationship is given a “second chance” requires more than forgiveness.. You must also let go..

But let go of what?

In almost all cases when you are having a difficult time forgiving someone, you are holding on to an attachment of some kind or another.. The attachments most commonly manifest themselves in the need to be justified, the need to be honored, the need to be right, the need to be vindicated, the desire for revenge, and the inability to move past fear..

So when you are holding onto an attachment, what you are actually doing is holding onto a position which is serving you in some way but it is not moving you forward in healing the relationship.. I suggest that you let go of negativity and attachments by deciding to drop them-by deciding that you no longer want to carry and live with the pain and suffering that you have been living.. Decide that you deserve the happiness that you want..

Key 4: Learn from the patterns of the past.. Stay conscious in all your relationships so that you won't repeat the same mistakes

One woman I know is trying to do it differently after several relationships that ended.. She is opening her heart to the possibilities of having the type of relationship that she has wanted but has somehow, up until now, eluded her.. She is starting a new relationship without expectations and is just focusing on being real, authentic and being true to herself.. She's not playing any of the roles she's played in the past as she enters this relationship.. There is a different feeling within her about this relationship because of it.. She is letting go of some of the destructive ways she has interacted with other partners in the past..

This is the first relationship that she has been honest about whether she wants to go somewhere with her partner or not.. In the past, she would always agree to go wherever her mate wanted to go because she wanted to please him rather than please herself.. After doing this for a period of time, she would lose sight of who she was and what she wanted and resentment would build.. Now, she is just allowing herself to open to the possibility of something wonderful happening and being herself in the relationship..

It is suggested that the first step in healing any pattern that is a challenge for you or causing you pain is to become aware of what you are feeling within your body when you experiencing the issue..

For example:
Susie had the pattern of not speaking her truth when there was conflict in past relationships.. When she and Otto came together, she wanted to stop that pattern because unspoken words and feelings would always turn into resentment and create walls with her previous husband.. She became aware that she felt a fluttery, sick feeling in her solar plexus and stomach when she didn't speak her truth and held back words.. With Otto, she came to recognize those feelings, honor them and allow herself to speak the words she was holding back..

The first step to creating any change is awareness and allowing yourself to notice what's going on in your body--whether it's tightness in your chest, neck pain, headache or nervousness in your stomach.. Go back in your mind.. When did you notice you would have these sensations in previous relationships? Susie traced her feelings and inability to speak her truth to her childhood.. Ask yourself, where did this feeling come from, who was there and what was the situation?

In a new relationship, as well as an old one, it's very important to differentiate what has happened in the past from what is happening now.. Your feelings can guide you to uncovering your patterns and to creating healthier ways of being in your relationships..

Step 5: Give thanks for the lessons that you learned and change your attitude

Haven't many of us been told or maybe we've “learned” that relationships were hard and filled with misery? We're here to suggest that it doesn't have to be that way.. You can decide to have the relationships that you want and “to make up your own state of mind..”

As painful as it is to hear, the truth is that everything in your life (including your relationships) is a result of the choices you have made up until now.. If you don't like the circumstances in your life or relationships, decide to make other choices..

This could mean changing your attitude.. It can mean focusing on what you like about your partner instead of what you don't like.. It could mean opening up to bring new people into your life.. It could mean deciding to be a better person in your relationships..

Whatever your challenges are, only you can decide to take one step forward toward having the relationships and the life you want.. If you are having challenges moving on from your previous relationship, we suggest you start by honoring that person as a teacher, here to help you on your journey.. When you find yourself feeling the victim or blaming the other person, change that thought to love and send it to him/her.. Sooner or later you will actually be able to give thanks for the lessons that that person taught you..

Giving gratitude for your relationship and your life, whether you have stayed or left, will be positive movement to what you want in life.. Change your attitude and you will change your life..

If you don't have the kind of relationship or the life that you really want, chances are excellent that there is one of two things standing between you and having what you want-- either there are things that you are not willing to do in order to have what you want or you are holding onto beliefs that are keeping you stuck..

We know from our own experience that when we have held onto limiting thoughts and beliefs, such as “I can't… or I could never…”, we remained stuck.. It wasn't until we opened ourselves to possibilities and changed our beliefs about those situations that we were able to move forward with those goals and heal..

Whether you have decided to stay in your relationship or leave it, we invite you to change your thinking, create positive thoughts and take some action that will help you to create the life that you want.. As you read through this article, you probably thought of some ways to move forward.. I now invite you to take this opportunity to move past your fears and start moving toward the relationships and life that you really want..

Someday.... (pt 2)

2010-11-19T14:00:00.000+08:00

Someday, in the distant future..
Remember the beautiful sunlight..
And the journey I took to see you..

At that faraway beach and sky..
Remember the precious memories we made..

You're my dazzlingly bright sea..
If you shove me away..
My dreams crumble into the whiteness..

I'm going away on a trip..
A long sea journey..
I'll carry my body..
On these soft waves towards you..

You're my dazzlingly bright sea..
If you shove me away..
My smile crumbles into the whiteness..

You know how much I truly love you..
Wrap yourself warmly.. softly.. with me...

Making A Decision..

2010-11-07T00:20:00.000+08:00

If, in front of your eyes, you found yourself with a bunch of choices.. How do you, pick the one choice that doesn't leave you with any regrets?..

Even if you, think really hard and are very careful, you might look back and think that you made the wrong choice..

If you were the only one affected, it might be okay.. but if it greatly affect others then... how do we know for sure which would be the best decision to make?..

Sometimes I do feel like I'm unable to make any choices at all.. Fear of having regrets..

However, for me, if I'll regret things or not, I know that it's something that I should consider, but then, sometimes, you'll die before you ever figure out if the choices you made were really mistakes or not..

Regardless of which choice they made, I think there will be people who regret it and people who don't..

Our choices, are our own to be made.. And never once should we blame others for how things turn out..

Just as people are different, so are their styles of decision making.. Each person is a result of all of the decisions made in their life to date.. Recognizing this, here are some tips to enhance your decision making batting average..

1. Use the O.A.R. approach in decision making.. O, Objectives you are seeking to attain, A, the Alternatives you sense are available to you and R, the Risk of the alternative you are considering..

2. Do not make decisions that are not yours to make..

3. When making a decision you are simply choosing from among alternatives.. You are not making a choice between right and wrong..

4. Try to avoid snap decisions.. Move fast on the reversible ones and slowly on the non-reversible..

5. Choosing the right alternative at the wrong time is not any better than the wrong alternative at the right time, so make the decision while you still have time..

6. Do your decision making on paper.. Make notes and keep your ideas visible so you can consider all the relevant information in making this decision..

7. Be sure to choose based on what is right, not who is right..

8. Write down the pros and cons of a line of action.. It clarifies your thinking and makes for a better decision..

9. Make decisions as you go along.. Do not let them accumulate.. A backlog of many little decisions could be harder to deal with than one big and complex decision..

10. Consider those affected by your decision.. Whenever feasible, get them involved to increase their commitment..

11. Recognize that you cannot know with 100% certainty that your decision is correct because the actions to implement it are to take place in the future.. So make it and don’t worry about it..

12. It has been said that a decision should always be made at the lowest possible level and as close to the scene of action as possible.. However, a decision should always be made at a level insuring that all activities and objectives affected are fully considered.. The first rule tells us how far down a decision should be made. The second how far down it can be made..

13. Remember that not making a decision is a decision not to take action..

14. To be effective a manager must have the luxury of having the right to be wrong..

15. Trust yourself to make a decision and then to be able to field the consequences appropriately..

16. Don’t waste your time making decisions that do not have to be made..

17. Determine alternative courses of action before gathering data..

18. Before implementing what appears to be the best choice, assess the risk by asking “What can I think of that might go wrong with this alternative?”

19. Many decisions you make are unimportant-about 80% of them.. Establish operating limits and let your colleagues or others make them for you..

20. Consider making the decision yourself in lieu of a group, but recognize the potential for less commitment by those affected..

21. As part of your decision making process, always consider how the decision is to be implemented..

22. As soon as you are aware that a decision will have to be made on a specific situation, review the facts at hand then set it aside.. Let this incubate in your subconscious mind until it is time to finally make the decision..

23. Once the decision has been made, don’t look back.. Be aware of how it is currently affecting you and focus on your next move.. Never regret a decision. It was the right thing to do at the time.. Now focus on what is right at this time..

24. Mentally rehearse implementation of your choice and reflect in your imagination what outcomes will result..

25. Brainstorming alternative solutions with your staff or others will gain fresh ideas and commitment..

26. Discontinue prolonged deliberation about your decision.. Make it and carry it through..

27. Once you have made the decision and have started what you are going to do, put the “what if’s” aside and do it with commitment..

In everyday life we often have to make decisions fast, without enough time to systematically go through the above action and thinking steps.. In such situations the most effective decision making strategy is to keep an eye on your goals and then let your intuition suggest you the right choice..

Attitude!

2010-10-18T12:41:00.001+08:00

This would be one of my simplest post ever..

"If you don't like something, change it.. If you can't change it, change your attitude.. Don't complain.."

So asks yourselves.. What have you been doing?

Types Of Love

2010-10-14T08:16:00.000+08:00

Is it really love you're feeling? How sure are you? If it is, then what type?

Sternberg's component of love

Do you feel the intimacy? How about the passion? Even so, what of the commitment?

The three components, pictorially labeled on the vertices of a triangle, interact with each other and with the actions they produce and with the actions that produce them so as to form seven different kinds of love experiences (nonlove is not represented).. The size of the triangle functions to represent the "amount" of love - the bigger the triangle the greater the love.. The shape of the triangle functions to represent the "type" of love, which may vary over the course of the relationship:

Nonlove is the absence of all three of Sternberg's components of love..

Liking/friendship in this case is not used in a trivial sense.. Sternberg says that this intimate liking characterizes true friendships, in which a person feels a bond, a warmth, and a closeness with another but not intense passion or long-term commitment..

Infatuated love is pure passion.. Romantic relationships often start out as infatuated love and become romantic love as intimacy develops over time.. Without developing intimacy or commitment, infatuated love may disappear suddenly..

Empty love is characterized by commitment without intimacy or passion.. Sometimes, a stronger love deteriorates into empty love.. In cultures in which arranged marriages are common, relationships may begin as empty love and develop into one of the other forms..

Romantic love bonds individuals emotionally through intimacy and physically through passionate arousal, but neither is sustained without commitment..

Companionate love is an intimate, non-passionate type of love that is stronger than friendship because of the element of long-term commitment.. Sexual desire is not an element of companionate love.. This type of love is often found in marriages in which the passion has gone out of the relationship but a deep affection and commitment remain.. The love ideally shared between family members is a form of companionate love, as is the love between close friends who have a platonic but strong friendship..

Fatuous love can be exemplified by a whirlwind courtship and marriage in which a commitment is motivated largely by passion without the stabilizing influence of intimacy..

Consummate love is the complete form of love, representing an ideal relationship toward which people strive.. Of the seven varieties of love, consummate love is theorized to be that love associated with the “perfect couple”.. Such couples will continue fifteen years or more into the relationship, they can not imagine themselves happy over the long-term with anyone else, they overcome their few difficulties gracefully, and each delight in the relationship with one other.. Maintaining a consummate love may be even harder than achieving it.. He stresses the importance of translating the components of love into action.. Without expression, even the greatest of loves can die.. Thus, consummate love may not be permanent.. If passion is lost over time, it may change into companionate love..

Why Not Be Not Single? How to Make Time for Romance

2010-10-13T08:28:00.002+08:00

Connecting with your partner emotionally and physically is a soothing balm for our frazzled lives.. A foot massage and a sympathetic ear give us the chance to recharge our selves and our love lives.. But after a long day of putting out fires at work,handling numerous phone calls, writing up that report, shuttling the kids back and forth, cooking, doing laundry, walking the dog, etc., etc.- the last thing on your mind is romance.. With so much competing for our attention it is easy to focus on everything but each other.. So, how do you find the time to connect with your sweetie? Make intimacy a habit just like your morning coffee and bagel by adding it into your daily routine..

1. Compliment each other on the things you like and appreciate about each other every day.. Let your partner know that he/she is in your thoughts and in your heart..

2. Create your own simple rituals that show that you care about each other.. Find a way to connect during the day with a note, a phone call, or an email..

3. Listen without giving advice, taking responsibility, or trying to "fix" things.. Let your mate enjoy the luxury of knowing that you are really listening.. Only give feedback if your mate asks for it..

4. Talk to each other about what's going on in your lives besides the day-to-day running of the household or office talk.. Share what you are feeling..

5. Hold each other.. A simple hug can do wonders..

6. Instead of the standard, "How was your day?" exchange, pick at least one good thing about your day and share it with each other..

7. Give each other a kiss when coming and going..

8. Laugh together - often..

9. Plan a regular "date" night once a week..

10. Say the words "I love you"..

You may be thinking that your relationship is the one thing in your hectic life that is stress-free, so why change things? While there is a certain level of comfort and predictability in a long-term relationship, the danger is that you may stop listening and may stop "being there" for your relationship.. Knowing your mate inside and out can also give both of you the illusion that you can read each other's minds.. And this can lead to misunderstandings which, when piled on top of each other, can lead to relationship disasters..

Talk to each other.. Listen.. Ask questions.. Don't assume.. As you continue to grow and change as an individual, so will your relationship.. Keep the lines of communication open by not tuning each other out.. This doesn't just apply to verbal communication either.. If your mate feels more like a roommate than a lover, perhaps you should incorporate more "togetherness" into your daily routines.. Love is in the little things, in the day-to-day details of our lives..

Good luck everyone ;)

New Song!

2010-10-10T09:07:00.003+08:00

Thanks to one of the games that I recently play, I found this song.. A great game with a great song.. Enjoy! ;)

The Time Has Come....

2010-10-08T09:36:00.000+08:00

The Last Poem..
The instant you stood before me..
I love your stare..
Though I cried yesterday..
Today because of you..
Tomorrow I'll be happy..

It's not your face...
It's not your coolness, no no..
All I needed was a soft love..

All the days that past..
I'll forget it..
Without you not even a day..
Only love..
All that I know is love..

It's time to close this chapter and start a new one instead.. My life have taught me one vital thing and that is: I came into this world alone.. I shall leave it alone.. And, if I have to live in it alone, so be it! I contend to live it in peace with myself..

A few days ago, I hung out with some of my friends.. We went for karaoke at Putrajaya from 11-1.. And then, we resumed karaoke-ing at Sri Kembangan.. There were 8 of us.. After that, we went for a drink.. Here's where the interesting part is..

One of my friends, had a really wonderful memory over the last few days.. Well, it was written on her blog, thus, lots of question arise then.. So there was a QnA session as we were having a drink.. And it ended up with her saying that she's afraid to go out with that guy again, coz she's afraid that she might get hurt again..

Well, we did understand that she doesn't wanna get hurt again.. But then, for how long should this continue on? Eventually, one will have to take the risk instead.. Just my point of view, why not now? Even closed door can be opened, correct?

"A real man doesn't make love to a million women.. A real man makes love to one women a million ways.."

Understand it.. Live it!

Life is full of risk.. The way we live our lives exposes us to some that we accept
almost without thinking, as part of daily living.. Everyone has read statistics about automobile accidents, but we still use our cars.. Why? Many people smoke even though they have heard thousands of times that it poses a risk of lung cancer and emphysema.. As human, we tend to exaggerate the risk associated with unfamiliar things, and underestimate the risk of familiar things..

Regarding love, it's basically the same.. Each option, each opportunity lies an inescapable risk.. The risk of getting rejected, the risk of getting hurt, the risk of getting dumped.. So many risks.. However, why do we always see the negative side of things?? Look at it this way.. What about taking the risk to be happy once in a while? The risk of finding your significant other? The risk of becoming successful? The risk of finding love?

There is no such thing as a total lost in this world.. Because even if you think that you lose something, you are actually gaining something else in exchange.. Don’t look at a relationship that didn’t work out as a failure.. Often it’s an imagined "failure" that fuels you to the success you’ve always dreamed of..

“To love is to risk not being loved in return.. To hope is to risk pain.. To try is to risk failure, but risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing.”

So, I ask this question to you.. What have you been risking? Are you totally being conservative? Are you standing still, when everyone around you is practically moving? Just remember, for as long as there's a will to achieve something, there will surely be a way.. There's no point in living life that has no risk-taking..

Memories..

2010-10-04T06:46:00.000+08:00

Looking back on the things I've done as I grow up.. It's quite hilarious.. All the things I've done.. If given the chance, I'd like to do certain things all over again.. Since I know I could do them better..

Growing up.. Yes there are a lot of unforgettable memories, however, one thing that I do not understand with parents nowadays.. They are so caught-up with earning money, that they forgot the most essential thing in raising a child.. The moments shared amongst them.. The hardships that they have to go through.. I'm not saying that it's not okay to keep earning money.. However, I believe that, by spending more time with their children, they can form their personalities accordingly..

Imagine a child, being brought up by maids, who hardly see his parents since they're too busy working their ass off, will become spoiled and hardly know the meaning of "family"..

But then, everyone has their own way to raise their children.. Who are we to judge.. Only they know what they've done, when they see the results.. which is what has become of the child they brought up...

Reasons..

2010-09-30T17:25:00.002+08:00

I could think of so many reasons to hate you.. But it won't change the feelings that I feel...

Last day of september..

2010-09-29T22:31:00.000+08:00

Tomorrow will be the last day of September.. This year's September, feels like it's the longest month ever.. With all the ups and downs.. All the faith and hope.. Fate twisted and destiny entangled.. But nonetheless, I survived all the ordeals with one thought in mind..

Guess I need to find a new song for my blog.. It's no longer gonna be September.. Heh..

10 Things A Modern Man Wants In A Woman

2010-09-22T01:37:00.002+08:00

She has a life of her own!

This is the first thing that a modern man would want to have in his woman. Gone are the days when a couple were seen as a single entity. A man would love his woman to have her own social life beyond him. Closing a couple inside a world away from social life will ruin it in the long run. Now this does not mean that a couple need to be overly social. The social level of a couple varies from one couple to another but each partner must have a social life.

Sense of Humor

Ladies prefer a guy who can make them laugh everyday. Guys are no different. They also want a woman who laughs along and keeps the relationship light and alive.

Knows what she wants

Men like their women confident and goal oriented. It gives them a kick to know that their woman is clear in her head and knows exactly what she is doing and how. Confidence definitely scores.

Independent

Men were the caretakers as far as our ancestors were concerned. But times have changed. With both the genders being equally successful and independent, men desire their women to be able to take care of themselves and not be the damsel in distress all the time.

Sharing Interests

Men do not want you to like everything that they do. If you don’t like his golf club, its fine with him, so long as you are just open to sharing his experiences and listen to him. That’s all they want, a healthy sharing of interests.

Tell me straight

All men want their women to be straight and upfront about what bothers them and not play around with words. It only confuses them. Straight talk is much appreciated. And the worst that a woman can do is to listen blindly to others and not clarify things with the man before reaching a conclusion!

She initiates sex

The days when sex initiation was taken to be the man’s domain are quite far behind now. Men appreciate their women to come up first and start it all, infact it is a turn on for most men.

Caring

No matter how modern or retro a man is , a caring woman is always desirable. Men want to be mothered for and not nagged, so caring is definitely a plus.

Space giving

They love you and do not feel it is important to be told a thousand times a day over calls and mails. Men would look for a woman who does not turn on the relationship pressure on a constant basis but rather understand and give them space to be. I precise on this one. Saying lovely words and expressing love during the day and very often is very good but if you keep saying it every 30 minutes over 24 hours, then you are either mad or not busy enough! Expressing love 5 to 6 times a day is however normal.

Spontaneity
This is much under- rated, but a highly desirable trait. It is usually propagated that women love surprises, but men too, relish spontaneity and on the spur moments and would love to have a spontaneous woman.

Best song for the month..

2010-09-14T10:29:00.001+08:00

I'm sittin' here all by myself

just tryin' to think of something to do

Tryin' to think of something, anything

just to keep me from thinking of you

But you know it's not working out

'cause you're all that's on my mind

One thought of you is all it takes

to leave the rest of the world behind

Oh, I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did

And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did

And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did

And you didn't mean to love me back

but I know you did

I'm sittin' here tryin' to convince myself

that you're not the one for me

But the more I think, the less I believe it

and the more I want you here with me

You know the holidays are coming up

I don't want to spend them alone

Memories of Christmas time with you

would just kill me if I'm on my own

Oh, I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did

And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did

And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did

And you didn't mean to love me back

I know it's not the smartest thing to do

we just can't seem to get it right

But what I wouldn't give to have one more chance tonight

one more chance tonight

I'm sittin' here tryin' to entertain myself with this old guitar

But with all my inspiration gone it's not getting me very far

I look around my room and everything I see reminds me of you

Oh please, baby won't you take my hand

we've got nothing left to prove

Oh, I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did

And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did

And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did

And you didn't mean to love me back

but I know you did

And I didn't mean to meet you then

when we were just kids

And I didn't mean to give you chills

the way that I kiss

And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did

And you didn't mean to love me back but I know you did

Don't say you didn't love me back 'cause you know you did

No, you didn't mean to love me back

But you did

Composed!

2010-09-11T14:45:00.000+08:00

A few friends of mine always asks me..

"For how long should I suffer?"

My reply to them was..

"Suffer? What made you think that I'm suffering?"

Well.. Yeah it's true that I seemed trouble most of the times, due to my "think too much" attitude.. But never once am I suffering..

Even when the situation made me fell, I'd simply enjoy falling down, and laugh all the way as I stand back up..

Despite that, I will always cherish the feelings I have.. This is all I can do... To stay composed, and be happy about all the things that happened..

1st day of raya..

2010-09-10T20:01:00.000+08:00

1st day of raya has come again.. And for some reason, I find myself staring into the distance... What fate has in store for me in the coming year, I do not know.. But with thoughts of you, I will, without a shadow of a doubt, stand tall and smile like I've never smiled before... :)

The Triangle of Love

2010-09-09T08:28:00.000+08:00

Well.. The picture has said it all..

Just my thoughts...

Sometimes.. We men feel women always shoot a bullet into our heart, causing great pain..

And sometimes, women feel the same towards men..

Maybe this is the unanswerable partnership that's been bothering all human..

But sometimes..

We have to ask ourselves..

Is she or he happy with us?

Do we not want someone whose heart doesn't contain us?

Maybe.. To let go is something big.. but that would be the biggest sacrifice for love..

If you really love her, you'll be happy when she's happy..

Because..

To love is not to own..

S.O.S

2010-09-04T20:28:00.001+08:00

Told you I made dinner plans
For you and me and no one else
That don't include your crazy friends
Well I'm done
With awkward situation's empty conversations

Oh This is an S.O.S.
Don't wanna second guess,
This is the bottom line
It's true
I gave my all for you,
now my heart's in two
And I can't find the other half

It's like I'm walking on broken glass,
Better believe I bled
It's a call I'll never get

So this is where the story ends
A conversation on IM
Well I'm done
With texting,
Sorry for the miscommunication

Oh This is an S.O.S.
Don't wanna second guess,
This is the bottom line
It's true
I gave my all for you,
now my heart's in two
And I can't find the other half

It's like I'm walking on broken glass,
better believe I bled
It's a call I'll never get
Next time I see you
I'm giving you a high five
'cause hugs are over rated, just FYI

Oh This is an S.O.S.
Don't wanna second guess,
This is the bottom line
It's true
I gave my all for you,
Now my heart's in two

(yeah)

Oh This is an S.O.S.
Don't wanna second guess,
This is the bottom line
It's true
I gave my all for you,
Now my heart's in two
And I can't find the other half

It's like I'm walking on broken glass,
Better believe I bled
It's a call I'll never get

Missing

2010-09-04T13:11:00.002+08:00

I tried coming alone to our usual park..
It's a feeling I've never felt..
Like a child, frightened by the sound of the wind..
I ran back alone the path home..
The sky outside the window is too fast, where are you know..
Please may this reach you..
Dear Lord if you ever grant wishes,
Grant my wish right now please!
I want to hear your voice, I miss you! I want to see you now..
Why must you already be looking toward tomorrow..
Don't just brush it off saying the time has slipped by..
Once more..
I love you and yet it's been too late since long ago..
Even if I give up it can't be like the past..
Don't just decide so simply there's no way, no choice..
Smile once more..

Efforts

2010-09-02T21:06:00.001+08:00

How not to have high expectations when you do things with 100% efforts?

Isn't it obvious? If you don't do things with full effort, how can your dreams be visualized and become a reality?..

Will someone even do things with all their can, if they have low expectations? Hmm..

Chiisana Koi No Uta..

2010-09-01T09:24:00.002+08:00

In this wide universe, there is
A big world in a blue earth
A small memory of love will reach
You who are living in a small island

Time has passed since I met you
The letter with my piled up feelings increases
Without us realizing, it is already echoing between us
Sometimes we’re full of intensity,
sometimes we’re full of sadness

These feelings echoes distantly
This gentle love song will change the world

Look, the person who is important to you
Is right beside you
I just want you to receive
This echoing love song
Listen, listen, listen to this echoing love song

You’ve realized even when we walked
In the dark, the moonlight will shine on us
I won’t let go of you hand
I swear that these strong feelings will last for eternity

In the depths of forever, I’ll definitely say
These same words without any change of feelings
Even if it’s still not enough, it’ll change into tears
And it’ll change into joy that I can’t put into words
I’ll just hold you, I’ll just hold you

Look, the person who is important to you
Is right beside you
I just want you to receive
This echoing love song
Listen, listen, listen to this echoing love song

If it’s a dream don’t wake up, if it’s a dream don’t wake up
The time I’ve spent with you will become an everlasting star

Look, the person who is important to you
Is right beside you
I just want you to receive
This echoing love song

Look, the person who is important to you
Is right beside you
I just want you to receive
This echoing love song
Listen, listen, listen to this echoing love song

Patience?

2010-09-01T04:50:00.005+08:00

Over the last few years, ever since my breakdown, I've learnt that going along with your emotions will bring you nowhere..

There's no point in being angry..

There's no point at all to complain..

There's no point at all to be depressed..

Life will sometimes drag you down, so you need to depend on yourself to pull you back up..

Most of the time, people will say what you wanna hear.. They lie.. But not in a bad way.. Just to lift your spirits again..

Upon walking on a path, we sometimes need to turn and take a glimpse of what we've gone through.. Just for a moment of course, and then, continue walking along the path..

Hurting yourself physically is a very good way to stop feeling hurt emotionally..

A few questions that I always ask myself.. What should I do now? By doing so, will I get the results I wanted? Can they be trusted? Why are they here? For what purpose? If things happened for a reason, what would be the reason for this?

Perhaps my bigger problem is I think too much.. And I have a few cases of... "ignorance" and "forgetting".. Maybe it's due to my persistence.. The inability to give up at such an early stage.. Even though I'm trying to forget, I'm remembering more and more.... All the laughs, joy, tears, sorrows, moments, memories that we share....

The Calling

2010-08-29T18:54:00.001+08:00

Can you hear this voice?
I've been calling that, always,
From deep within my heart

Would you, all alone, let another lonely one be next to you
Because together it's not lonely, it's twoly
See, you're not alone any longer

Just because there's no one next to me
Doesn't mean that I'm lonely
For someone to notice this pain
That heart must have surely cried

Right now, we'll crush to bits
The fortress of our limitless sadness
I'll take you with me

Got it? I'm running through at full power
To where you're waiting, left behind,
In the place of tears
I believe in you, with burning passion
So, come to me!

Future..

2010-08-29T17:58:00.004+08:00

There are no boring days
The future looks so exciting
Every day is full or surprises
The hurdles are so high
You can't get over them with half-assed feelings

When you find out what's happening
When you take the effort to answer
It can't be hard...
The bad times aren't useless

Eternity lasts forever
With this fleeting feelings
And the sky splits apart your illusion
Believe without looking away
And let's go laughing all the way..

Hidamari (Sunny Place)

2010-08-28T17:49:00.003+08:00

Kimi ga kureta kotobatachi wa
Suteki da kedo nazo mo ooi kara
Itsumo hitorikiri no toki
Sono imi ni kizuku

Ato ni natte yasashisa o shiru
Arigatou o ii ni oikakeru
Nanoni kimi wa sono saki o susundeite
Oitsukenai mama de

Hikari ga sasu akarui hi no hou e hashirou
Kitto soko de kimi ga mieru ne
Yami no naka o susumu hazu ga nai

Taiyou no kakudo de kage ni naru yokogao o
Mamorinukeru kurai takaku tsuyoku terashitai yo
Shinayaka na hidamari no you ni

Kimi ga warai furimuita toki
Kuraku natta soba no hoo ni wa
Umaku keshita tsumori demo
Namida no sen oritatamareteita

Damatta mama mune no hako no naka ni shimaou
Sotto shiteteagetai koto nara
Tatta hitotsu dekiru sakimawari

Hikari to kagetachi ga chirachira suru komorebi
Tsutsundeshimaitai tanoshii kanashii dono omoi mo
Atataka na hidamari no you ni

Egao no o o hiite kimi wa mata sono saki e
Tsutsundeshimaitai ureshii kuyashii kono omoi mo

Taiyou no kakudo de kage ni naru yokogao o
Mamorinukeru kurai takaku tsuyoku terashitai yo
Shinayaka na hidamari no you ni

Hanarete mo yorisoeru kokoro

The words you gave me
They were wonderful, but cryptic all the same
It’s always when I’m all alone
That the meaning sinks in

Only later on do I realize your kindness
I run after you to say thank you
But you've already proceeded ahead
Before I could catch up with you

I’ll run to a bright and shining day
I know I’ll see you there
You couldn't possibly tread into the darkness

The angle of the sun causes shadows to cast upon your profile
I want to shine high and bright, just enough to protect it
Like a nice and sunny place

When you smiled and turned your face away
Despite your best efforts to hold they back
Tears trickled down
The darkened side of your cheek

I’ll silently tuck it away into a box in my heart
If I wish to leave you be
Then all that can be done is to beat you to it

Shadows and light flicker under the eaves of the trees
I want to embrace all the running emotions, the joy and the sorrow
Like a warm and sunny place

Leaving a trail of smiles behind you, you continue onwards
I want to embrace this feeling of being torn between happiness and regret

The angle of the sun causes shadows to cast upon your profile
I want to shine high and bright, just enough to protect it
Like a nice and sunny place

Though separated, my heart lies close to yours

Omamori Himari - Hidamari

2010-08-28T17:47:00.000+08:00

きみがくれた言葉たちは
すてきだけど謎も多いから
いつもひとりきりのとき
その意味に気づく

あとになってやさしさを知る
ありがとうを言いに追いかける
なのにきみはその先を進んでいて
追いつけないままで

光が射す明るい日のほうへ走ろう
きっとそこできみがみえるね
闇のなかを進むはずがない

太陽の角度で陰になる横顔を
まもりぬけるくらい高く強く照らしたいよ
しなやかなひだまりのように

きみがわらいふりむいたとき
くらくなったがわの頬には
うまく消したつもりでも
涙の線折りたたまれていた

だまったまま胸の箱のなかにしまおう
そっとしててあげたいことなら
たった1つできる先まわり

光と影たちがちらちらする木もれ陽
つつんでしまいたい楽しいかなしいどの想いも
暖かなひだまりのように

笑顔の尾をひいてきみはまたその先へ
つつんでしまいたい嬉しいくやしいこの想いも

太陽の角度で陰になる横顔を
まもりぬけるくらい高く強く照らしたいよ
しなやかなひだまりのように

離れてもよりそえるこころ

Thoughts About Love...

2010-08-28T09:00:00.002+08:00

Love is a cycle..

When you love, you get hurt, you hate..

When you hate, you try to forget..

When you try to forget, you start missing..

And when you start missing, eventually you'll fall in love again...

Hope..

2010-08-28T01:31:00.000+08:00

Like a little hope,
Even during the bloody battles..
Even when I told myself it was for my family..
Even when I'm about to lose,
That is what supported me from the deepest parts of my heart..

Watashi ni yakusoku.. :)

Thoughts Conveyed...

2010-08-25T23:50:00.003+08:00

Himitsu (Secret)

2010-08-24T11:06:00.002+08:00

You see...
It seems I've been wounded, yet the words I truly desired..
To make me fulfilled, were living in the depths of my heart..
I'm troubled..

I have only a bit more than my body's warmth as my pulse quickens in the lukewarm wind..
Speaking of a distant future, I've seen that face before..
Together we can travel to the interior of my dreams..
It's like... this is each our body..

The pistol known as love is shooting mid-way to my heart..
Tactics like this, I can't grasp the meaning of such knowledge..
The trigger known as love is drawn, shooting at my icy heart..
Filling me with your love all the way to my fingertips..

You see...
It seems I'm always forgotten, like a meaningless silver coin one receives..
But a dully lighted gem can progress to shining, with drops of tears..
Just knowing me, that was a secret..

I've lost everything, and hunched over with a sigh, I've thawed in the dawn..
It's of no use to be on this path..
Yet in my hand is a shiny quarter dollar..
My feelings have been freed, as I grasp tightly to my courage..
I smile at the canopy that has been opened in my trembling heart..

My audacious lips are now held shut.....

I give to you only warmth, shooting mid-way from my heart..
Tactics like this, I can't grasp the meaning of such knowledge..
The trigger known as love is drawn, shooting out tainted blossoms..
And once more I will break down and give you a much-prized kiss..

Love

2010-08-23T12:54:00.001+08:00

I think the video says it all :)

Quote

2010-08-23T09:36:00.003+08:00

“If you ask what is the single most important key to longevity, I would have to say it is avoiding worry, stress and tension. And if you didn't ask me, I'd still have to say it.”- George F. Burns

It's true.. I'd still say it eventually even if I didn't say it before..

“I don't pretend to know what love is for everyone, but I can tell you what it is for me; love is knowing all about someone, and still wanting to be with them more than any other person, love is trusting them enough to tell them everything about yourself, including the things you might be ashamed of, love is feeling comfortable and safe with someone, but still getting weak knees when they walk into a room and smile at you.”

Just One Last Dance...

2010-08-22T17:21:00.002+08:00

Can I have..just one last dance?

Just one last dance.... Oh baby... Just one last dance

We meet in the night in the Spanish cafe
I look in your eyes just don't know what to say
It feels like I'm drowning in salty water
A few hours left 'til the sun's gonna rise
Tomorrow will come an it's time to realize
Our love has finished forever

How I wish to come with you (wish to come with you)
How I wish we make it through

Chorus:
Just one last dance
Before we say goodbye
When we sway and turn round and round and round
It's like the first time
Just one more chance
Hold me tight and keep me warm
Cause the night is getting cold
And I don't know where I belong
Just one last dance

The wine and the lights and the Spanish guitar
I'll never forget how romantic they are
But I know, tomorrow I'll lose the one I love

There's no way to come with you
It's the only thing to do

Just one last dance, just one more chance, just one last dance

Something Interesting..

2010-08-21T09:29:00.007+08:00

Hatred.. not harted.. It sums up as the Law Of Attraction.. Whatever you give out, you get back..

If you feel sad, or lonely, or even there's something bothering you.. I'll be willing to listen as long as you're willing to tell..

Love is about giving without expecting anything in return..

Just For You..

2010-08-20T11:16:00.005+08:00

They always question why I'm in love with you..
They said, I can get someone better than you..

And every single time, I just smiled.. =)

Maybe you're not as pretty as other girls..

Sometimes you're harsh..

Sometimes your temper comes with no warning..

Sometimes I got a headache trying to tend to your attitude..

But nonetheless,

Even though you're not the prettiest, you never question my looks.. You said I'm the most charming guy in the world..

No matter how harsh you are, you still cry when watching Korean movies..

Yes sometimes your temper is unpredictable, but your cuddliness are still there

Even though you're stubborn at times, your love, only I can feel them..

For what reason do we tell the happiness we share?
Let them say what they want.. Ignore them..
I know the one I love better.. =)

Yes.. Forever

2010-08-20T07:38:00.000+08:00

I'll say yes forever
I'll always be next to you
No matter what future may come to challenge us
I swear
Our fates crossed each others paths
Because i heard your voice

Yes, even if a crisis was to come
I'll be able to overcome it if I'm with you
With throbbing heart and fortitude
Things look unsure and make me worry
Stay with me I just want to protect you
Even though we were born far away from each other

I say yes forever
I'll always be next to you
Let's change any kind of future into hope..
Forever

Tangga - Terbaik Untukmu

2010-08-18T20:01:00.002+08:00

All the MVs on youtube regarding this song have been taken down due to some copyright claims.. So if you wanna listen to this song, search for it in 4shared.. And here's a translated version of the lyrics..

I've realized by now..
We are getting further apart..
I managed to think about it..
You're the one who wanted it..
Away from my hugs..

Oh Now I've realized..
This is my fault..
I don't want to be late and regret this..

Forgive me when I always..
Make you annoyed and hate me..
I did all those things..
Just to make you happy..

Maybe I didn't quite understand..
How to show what I meant..
I was just trying to be.. The best for you...

I want you always be here with me..
Don't go..
Give me a chance..
For me to prove..
Determination of my love..

To you.. The one I'm missing so much...

A Kiss? Why Do We Kiss?

2010-08-18T09:43:00.005+08:00

Whether we use it as an informal greeting or an intensely romantic gesture, kissing is one of those ingrained human behaviors that seems to defy explanation..

A kiss isn't just a kiss! The lip-to-lip contact may have been passed on through evolution, not only as a necessary means of survival, but also as a general way to promote social bonding and as an expression of love..

Now, it’s believed that kissing helps transfer critical information, rather than just meat bits.. The kissing we associate with romantic courtship may help us to choose a good mate, send chemical signals, and foster long-term relationships.. All of this is important in evolution’s ultimate goal—successful procreation..

Kissing allows us to get close enough to a mate to assess essential characteristics about them, none of which we’re consciously processing.. Part of this information exchange is most likely facilitated by pheromones, chemical signals that are passed between animals to help send messages..

Researchers found that women didn’t just chose their favorite scent randomly.. They preferred the scent of man whose major histocompatibility complex (MHC)—a series of genes involved in our immune system—was different from their own.. Having a different MHC means less immune overlap and a better chance of healthy, robust offspring.. Kissing may be a subtle way for women to assess the immune compatibility of a mate, before she invests too much time and energy in him..

Although common in courtship, females put more importance on kissing, and most would never have sex without kissing first.. Since females across species are often the choosier ones when it comes to mate selection, these differences in kissing behavior make sense.. Men are also more likely to initiate French kissing and researchers hypothesize that this is because saliva contains testosterone, which can increase libido.. Researchers also think that men might be able to pick up on a woman’s level of estrogen, which is a predictor of fertility..

Kissing isn’t all mating practicality; it also feels good.. That’s because kissing unleashes a host of feel-good chemicals, helping to reduce stress and increase social bonding.. The longer the couples had been in a relationship, the farther their levels dropped..

It could be that women need more than a kiss to stimulate attachment and bonding.. Therefore, kissing plays a role not only in mate selection, but also in bonding.. Kissing is involved in the three main types of attraction humans have: sex drive, romantic love, and attachment.. Thus, evolved to help on all three fronts..

Whether we live in a place where kissing is reserved for close acquaintances, or somewhere where a casual greeting means a one, two, or three cheeker, one thing does remain highly consistent: the side to which people turn while kissing.. It’s almost always to the right.. Twice as many adults turn their heads to the right rather than the left when kissing..

And now, here comes to great part..

One of the best things about kissing, however, is that we don’t have to think about any of this.. Just close eyes, pucker up, and let nature takes its course..

A new chapter..

2010-08-13T21:10:00.005+08:00

Hmm.. When I realize it.. I've been changing phones quite a lot over the last few years.. But most of the time, it's due to a "burial of memories"..

From Sony K770i

To a black Sony C510

To a Sony C702

To a white Sony C510.. (As of this moment, I started using 2 phones which is C702 and C510)

And now changed my Sony C702 into a Sony W995.. (Yes I've lost this phone once and I bought another one just like it...)

Should I or should I not?.. My C510.. has approximately 2000+ messages from her.. The memories we share.. I've always wanted to share everything, yes EVERYTHING, that happened to me with her.. Amongst all of my friends, even the ones who knew me for a loooonnggg time, she is the only one who knew about my deepest, darkest secret.. The changing point that occurred in my life.. And yes, I really miss texting her, annoys her, and most of importantly, I miss making her smile..

I really really wanted to make things right again between us.. But I can only do that if she wanted me to.. Until that time comes.................

To you.. Yes.. YOU..

2010-08-11T08:03:00.004+08:00

Slumbering in my heart..
A tiny, tiny wound go unnoticed..
Flooding from the gap..
Your name, strong and gentle eyes, fingers, and hair made me come to realize..
That I could meet you..
Talk to you..
Started wishing I could touch you, before I realized it..
Emotions aroused, they can't be stopped..
So even if I trip, my heart will run like the wind..
I fell in love with your profile..
And I'd feel so broken-hearted...
I really really love you..

August.. 2010..

2010-08-11T02:20:00.005+08:00

0810 has arrived.. For some reason, it's been the same for three years in a row.. Will the situation continue until November? I'm.. not sure.. But all I can do is smile and walk forward.. Even though she's not around anymore...

If you really love someone, I believe that there is nothing in the world that you cannot overcome.. But first, you need to fully understand him/her..

Maybe it's just me who feels this way.. But.. If you're sick, I want to look after you.. If you're feeling down, I want to be the person that lifts you back up again.. More than that.. I want to be the person who always make you smile.. I want to be the guy you grow old with.. I may be mean at certain time.. But my feelings are real..

If you're reading this.. I hope.. you would give me another chance to make things better again.. I really do miss you..

Love and Books..

2010-08-09T18:57:00.003+08:00

Love is like reading a book

Being in love is like reading a book.. Once you have made up your mind to start reading a book, you are deem to expect its conclusion.. You know for sure there is generally 2 possible conclusions.. Either it's a "Happily Ever After" and you feel worth reading it...or its a 'tragic disaster' that cause a lot of dissatisfaction.. Then you will begin to struggle through all the 'unanswerable' questions as to why, how, when, who, what and where?

You feel extremely disappointed and upset cause that's what you least expect.. You feel you've given in too much time (& hope) just to reach to the conclusion of the story, but it turns out of expectation.. By this time, these questions might wander in your mind..."Why is this happening to me? Why me?" But have you ever thought of this 'why', did you really get the answer to your question? Let me tell you.. Your questions were due to your 1st move.. which is.. decided to read that particular book.. That's why you shouldn't regret no matter what happen cause it was your decision..

A novel is like a living thing that has its life destined.. An author decides on the storyline of a book/novel.. As you flip to the 1st page, sooner or later you will reach the last page and the ending will be revealed.. Unless you quit reading when is half way through but you will never know the ending and if you wait for others to tell you, it will be too late and totally meaningless to you already.. As for love, once you decided to be with someone, you're bound to expect an ending, either a happy ending or a disaster that follow up by phobia, hatred, anger disappointment.. No matter what there shouldn't be any regret. Its all fated..

When you love someone, if he or she is happy, you will also be happy...
I really wonder...How many ppl actually can do that... Love is selfish... No matter how, there is definitely someone who is hurt... No matter how we avoid it.... Is there love that doesn't hurt anyone?? "If Love doesn't hurt, than it is not Love anymore.." Is this true???....

Happy?

2010-08-03T23:27:00.003+08:00

If you can only be happy while making others happy, how would you be, when everyone else around you disappear? If there's no one to impress, no one to talk to, no one to cheer up, then how would you be happy then?

Just a thought.. From lovers, to reset the relationship, will it be friends? No.. Even friendship starts from being a stranger.. It goes like this..

Stranger -> Acquaintance -> Friends -> Best friends

When you wanna reset a relationship, you can't start from the middle.. You have to start from the beginning.. As a stranger.. Then only it can progress again..

And no, from best friends, the likelihood of progressing into lovers is less than 1%.. Yes there are cases where best friends fall in love, live happily ever after, bla bla bla.. But what happens when one feels more comfortable being just a "best friend"?

Just... A few words of wisdom... Diary of An Insomniac page 210

2010-08-01T07:49:00.002+08:00

Today will NEVER come again.. Be a blessing.. Be a friend.. Encourage someone.. Take time to care.. Let your words heal, and not wound.. Coz today will never come again..

Live... Love... Laugh.. Do each everyday.. Smile and hug the people in your life, let them know you care and that you love them..

Everyday you wake up is a blessing.. Treat it like that.. Be thankful for all you have and enjoy the fact that you're here to have your problems..

MISTAKES makes me human. FAILURE makes me stronger. LOVE keeps me alive. But its YOU who keeps me smiling :)

Accept failure but do not accept not trying!

Never regret your past, only regret if you don't learn from it!

The moment you think of giving up, think of a reason why you held so long.. Do or die is an old saying.. Do it before you die is the new one..

If you're troubled today remember to breath slow, take one moment at a time, put the stereo on your favorite song, and sing as loud as you can!

Attracting Women.. (Diary of an Insomniac page 204)

2010-07-22T05:45:00.003+08:00

There are two secrets to meeting beautiful women and without them, the best methods in the world will not work.. These are: the right attitude and being unique in your approach.. Being unique may draw all kinds of girls to you, but you must have the proper attitude to hold on to them.. These are so important that I will cover them in detail right now.

-Attitude-

This is the most important quality you can possess to be successful with women.. Nothing, and I mean nothing, can compare with a superior attitude.

You can be the best looking guy in the world, but without a good attitude very few women will end up in your arms.. Let me tell you how it helped me..

"You might be a very nice guy but if you want to meet and hold onto a lot of women, you have to change your attitude... Women do not want a guy who is weak and unsure of himself... They want someone who is strong and self confident.. Be a little hard to get, a little casual and sly but also be tender and caring... Know you can do it, and you will have hundreds of women.."

-Unique-

There is not one female in this world who wants a guy who is average.. She is always looking for a guy who is different, her knight in shining armor, her dream man, the man who is unique.. That's why these methods will work, because they are different and very unique.. Any guy can walk up to 100 women and maybe 1 to 10 will show some interest.

But I want you to be successful with nearly 100% of the women, and you will nearly approach that when you have the right attitude and are unique in meeting women.. From this day forward, you will eliminate the word average from your life and substitute the word unique.. You will become a real ladies man, a man who has dozens of women at his fingertips.. You will never be lonely again.. You must attain the correct attitude and you will never be without women.. No woman seeks the common man..

They seek the man who is different, the man who is unique.. Every one of these methods are unique and different.. That is why they will work.. Have faith in me and these methods and you will succeed.

Unless you look like a Greek God or a movie star, you will have very little chance of meeting girls in bars using the normal and common methods.. Ask yourself on what other point could she possibly make her decision.. Now take a look in the mirror.. Can you make it on your looks alone?

I can't.. Therefore it's mandatory to rely on something other than your looks in order to meet sexy women in the singles bars.. You must become appealing to her.. You must reverse the normal procedure.. By doing this you will be able to select and attract the really beautiful girls and become truly appealing to them.. This is what these methods will do for you.

I want to pound this idea into your mind.. To attract women you must reverse the original situation.. In the beginning you are attracted to her.. You want to meet her.. Your opening maneuver should be to turn the tables so that now she is attracted to you, and wants to meet you.. This might seem difficult but it is very very easy.

You can accomplish this by arranging her first thoughts of you to be, "He is unique, different, and very interesting." Once you have arranged this, she will be very pleased to meet you and get to know you.. That is what these methods will do for you..

TBC

Diary of an Insomniac page 202.. "Thoughts for her..."

2010-07-19T03:27:00.005+08:00

Through the years in life, you met several great women and with them you learn valuable lessons.. Sometimes you just could not expect things to be good.. Sometimes life can be very negative, but deciding to stay positive all the time can be a good thing (in the long term)..

Everyone’s been hurt, at least once in their lifetime.. It really hurts like hell, but from those painful moments you really learn something from it.. Learn to be patient and learn to be more wiser and understanding.. It is hard to understand the opposite sex but its worth the try.. Because you know its worth it, I know its worth it..

Have you ever been in a situation where you did what you expected to be positive and the end result is the opposite? Well, you did the right thing but the wrong move.. That is where you’ll learn..

In life of love, for me, there’s 2 things.. Acceptance and Rejection.. What I never learned is what’s in the middle between both.. Compared to the 1st and 2nd ,the one in the middle is the hardest for me to deal with.. Its what we call as, Ignorance or another thing is ‘Hanging Situation’.. I’ve been through it and it really tears open every single bit of whats left in your soul.. Being ignored by someone you had known for a long time really hurts.. Even when you’ve been honest with her and told her every single reasons for your actions.. The thing here is, I’ve tried.. Being patient for years really tests my life.. Some people might say there’s still others out there waiting, But I can't do that.. Because it will totally change my perception towards woman..

They are not clothes like the ones you change everyday, they are human.. And humans have feelings.. U can't change love like changing your clothes.. That’s not even love.. If you believe in the term 'fake love' then you're screwing people’s mind.. Try to think of the consequences.. U played with people’s mind and loyalty, and when you leave them they got hurt like hell.. If they were to think negatively, they’ll follow the footsteps of the person who did that to them.. What happens next? U know the answer.. The cycle will continue, and those who are loyal will be the victims over and over again.. Be rational and logic..

Sometimes what you did in the past can be either a good thing or a bad thing for the future.. Sometimes you never realized that the past can sometimes tells us the good value of people who once were and still nice to u.. But no one is perfect.. Not even me.. So in life you learn the term ‘changes’.. Its for the benefit of yourselves.. Why is it important? Because you live only ONCE.. And everything has got to be positive throughout your life.. Me? I did my best but still I screwed up so that will be the closing of my chapter.. Because in this chapter of mine, I've hurt someone I cared the most, I failed to understand her, and I don’t want that to happen to somebody else.. I’ve done enough and in return what I get is failure so its something that I hope will heal someday..

So people, be rational and think of what I’ve wrote.. Don’t love women just for what you see with your eyes, love them for the good things of what they did not see within themselves.. Because that is where you will really appreciate them the most..

Counting days.. 363 to go.. Diary of an insomniac page 201

2010-07-14T07:04:00.011+08:00

Argghh.. I can't sleep tonite.. I'm not sure why.. Maybe it's because the durians I ate.. It's becoming so hot in this room... Too many durians.. urgghhh...

Unexpected Part 2

2010-07-05T02:33:00.009+08:00

I have to admit.. I was feeling a bit insecure over the last few weeks.. A certain someone has been on my mind.. I'm not sure what was going on.. However, last Saturday, finally she explained.. And suddenly, all the rain and dark clouds are gone.. Life is bright once again.. Even all the ordeals fell upon me, I can still smile..

When I'm down, just a simple text from you would make me feel better..

As you focus yourself on something positive, yes, surely and definitely, something positive will happen.. Alas, a new playlist is up.. Enjoy ^_^

Speaking of which, I lost my handphone, Sony Ericsson W995, at a nearby internet cafe, at approximately 12.45am yesterday.. All the important contacts and details are in there.. Damn..

To top things off, around 12 noon today, I had an accident with a motorcycle.. Will talk about that more later on..

For now, I have to continue walking, face front, chest up, with a big smile on my face :D

I Have A Magic Dolphin :D

2010-07-01T12:10:00.002+08:00

Drifting alone
Where am I to go
The purpose in me
Sadly I don't know

Who'll take my hand
I'm sailing in the sand
Nothing to enjoy
Feeling quite destroyed

But I know a magic dolphin
Swimming above the world
And in my dreams it promised me
That someday I'll find my girl

No one to love
No one to lose
All by myself
This is what I choose

Lovers everywhere
Why should I even care
Will I ever change
That would sure be strange

But I know a magic dolphin
Swimming above the world
And in my dreams it promised me
That someday I'll find my girl

She has the taste of summer
Cute shiny eyes of love
And until I find that girl of mine
I have a friend above
Yes, I have a friend above

'Cause I know a magic dolphin
Swimming above the world
And in my dreams it promised me
That someday I'll find my girl

She has the taste of summer
Cute shiny eyes of love
Until I find that girl of mine
I have a friend above
I have a friend above
Yes, I have a friend above

My First Open Tournament!

2010-07-01T00:53:00.004+08:00

I drove out around 9.. Feels like having a few games of bowling.. When I arrived there, it was more crowded than usual.. Something is up, or so I thought.. Turns out, they were having a tournament.. Weekly Singles Tournament..

With an entrance fee of RM60, I have to play a total of 5 games..

For some reason.. Bowling is much more fun playing with people rather than playing alone.. I wish my No 1 cheerleader was there.. I might be able to perform better.. With her in mind, saying good luck for me, I managed to once again achieve a new personal record.. And that would be 190..

Certain things that happened, had a undesirable ending, because we don't allow it to continue on.. Maybe things would different if only she wants it to happen.. I'm sure things will be different.. For every pain, I'd be the instant remedy.. And for every joy, I'd be the multiplier..

Sometimes, I'd just pretend that she's next to me and started talking.. Though there won't be a reply, just the thought of being able to talk to her is enough.. That will surely brighten my day..

High Score!

2010-06-29T02:39:00.006+08:00

Though my thumb is hurting.. I finally managed to set a new high score for bowling.. ^_^

186!! do click on the picture for a clearer view

If I can do this with an injured thumb, imagine how I'll perform when it's better.. Hmmm..

Focus is important.. With focus, anything is possible! ＼(^_^)／

New playlist

2010-06-28T03:50:00.001+08:00

I have a new playlist on my blog.. nuff said lol

Unexpected...

2010-06-27T22:09:00.010+08:00

For some reason, since I stopped my addiction to computer games, I've become addicted with bowling.. If last time, I'd play games to reduce my stress, now, it's bowling.. Through bowling, it allows me to concentrate fully on the game itself..

For starters, let me show u my bowling balls..

The red one is 12lbs, and for straight while the purple one is 13lbs and it's for hooks

It's only recently that I started playing hooks.. Before, it's always either straight or backup(reverse hook).. The holes for the hand placement are different.. So you can't do a good hook with a straight ball..

For the first time ever, my finger was bleeding.. I wasn't sure when exactly did it started bleeding.. But it should be after my 3rd game.. Imagine bowling with an injured thumb, and continued for the next 5 games..

This was when I realized my finger was bleeding..

After the 5th game..

After completing my 8th game..

After I cleaned all the powder and the dried blood off my hand..

Yeah.. It hurts.. But for some reason, when I bowl, I don't feel the pain at all.. It started hurting as I focused on the injury..

I guess what they say about the Law of Attraction is correct.. Be it out-of-the-blue, fell into place, serendipity, coincidence, synchronicity, luck, fate, meant to be, or even karma.. The law of attraction is actually at work..

It goes like this.. From words, thoughts are created, and from thoughts, comes vibration... The law of attraction checks out what vibration you are giving, either positive or negative.. Then it matches and GIVES BACK MORE OF THE SAME VIBRATION YOU'RE GIVING OUT.. If you give out negative vibration, it will give back negative feelings, and if you give out positive vibration, it will give back positive feelings..

Words -> Thoughts -> Vibration -> Result

Now.. What is a vibration? Vibration is taken from the word vibe is often used to describe a mood, or a feeling that you picked up from someone, or something.. So be careful when you're feeling down, you MIGHT be sending out negative vibes to everyone else..

What you experience, and how you react, will affect everything around you.. The law of attraction responds to how you feel about what you say, and how you feel about what you think..

The first step to improve yourselves is, to IDENTIFY what makes you feel good and do more of it.. Be clear of what you want.. Sounds easy right? The challenge is that most people are not good at knowing what they DO want, but they are good at identifying what they DON'T want.. Knowing what you don't want is actually good news.. You can observe contrast and identify it.. As you do that, you will become clearer of what you want..

So tell me.. What do YOU really WANT? And what have you DONE to acquire it?

Tagged by Doryn again =|

2010-06-27T02:02:00.005+08:00

Thanks for the award Doryn~

And I need to answer a few questions:

Write 5 interesting facts about the person who gave you this award

* kind
* cute
* a football maniac
* always and i mean ALWAYS post on her facebook wall
* thanks for her I've realized certain things..

Jots down 10 interesting facts about yourself and your hobby

- I'm crazy about study of the mind / soul
- I love to bowl :D
- Someone called me silly :P
- Prefers to be alone at home
- I always drive fast when I'm alone
- I can't sit still without thinking
- I hate football.. Nuff said xD
- I like classical music and oldies..
- When I set my mind on something, I will do whatever I can to get my goal..
- Be nice to me and I'll be nice to you regardless of who you are

Pick your most 10 deserving recepients and describe them

* Nadd.. A close friend of mine for 2 years+.. Don't know about what I'd do without her..
* Deevon.. My gaming buddy.. and my ex-roommate..
* Anna.. My ex-classmate when I was studying in MMU
* Ap.. My MMU friend
* Hanip.. Ex-classmate in MMU
* MedeaDayana.. A fren from MMU
* Ika.. A blog fren
* Puteri Aladdin.. blog fren as well
* kiki.. blog fren
* Effa.. another blog fren

XeNo

2010-06-25T01:16:00.003+08:00

Nicknames.. How did you get yours?

As for me, I got it from a game Xenogears, of which I played when I was 15, and the first adventure RPG that I've played.. And as I ventured further into the game, I found out that a gear is what they'd call a robot.. And Xeno is strange.. So.. Xenogears means strange robots..

Why I like this nick?
It's simple actually.. I like to see myself as strange.. Not strange as in weird.. But strange as in different from others..

FYI, Xenos is a word used in the Greek language from Homer onwards that has a wide gradient of meaning, signifying such divergent concepts as “enemy stranger” as well as “ritual friend”.. can also be used simply to assert that someone is not a member of your community, that is simply foreigner and with no implication of reciprocity or relationship.. Xenos generally refers to the variety of what a particular individual can be, specifically guest, host, stranger, friend, and, as previously mentioned, foreigner..

And also, Xenos is the Greek concept of hospitality, or generosity and courtesy shown to those who are far from home..

Now ask yourself.. Why do you like your nick?

Note to self

2010-06-22T15:36:00.007+08:00

Well.. I have to admit.. It didn't take long for me to realize this.. Thanks to an old friend of mine for the advice..

I've been heartbroken for a few times already.. Another one shouldn't really matter..

Well.. It's true.. Now that I've thinking rationally again, perhaps this is for the best.. I wouldn't be hoping for anything more, and she wouldn't be stressed out because of me.. What's more important now is for me to focus on myself, and improving myself!

Life is always unfair.. It's up to you to do something about it.. If you do nothing, then nothing will change.. Get up! And change your fate!

I'm not sure what to write today.. So I'll just recall what I've recently read and learnt.. And that would be bowling..

The Preparation

First of all, what you need is a good bowling ball.. Not too heavy and not too light.. It's best if you get your own bowling ball rather than borrowing or renting it.. This way, you can get used to your ball and what it does to your advantage!

Always, and I mean ALWAYS get half size bigger than your actual shoe size.. They need to be taken care of and it's always best if they're your own.. That way your foot gets used to it and works better instead of hurting you..

Did you know? Bowling requires tremendous amount of concentration.. When you start, you need to concentrate on HOW PEOPLE BOWL.. And when it's your turn, you need deep concentration to correlate between styles and moves.. Then, the stance is very crucial. The person must stand nearly one and a half meters away from the foul line. Face the pins directly and in a straight line.. The ball must be held at waist height. Out of the seven pins, the middle one must never be aimed.. Right-handed bowlers must aim for the right arrow and left-handers for the left one..

Steps to Bowl

Step forward with the right foot and push the ball out and down simultaneously.. The ball then swings down to the side like a pendulum..
The left hand is extended outwards for balancing..
the ball moves maximum backwards, but not more than shoulder height.. The elbow should be straight..
With the left knee bent, slide forward using the left foot.. The ball must naturally roll off the hand..

Tips

Don't look at the pins or you will get distracted and throw off key.. Watch where you release and watch the ball go over your mark.. It won't always do that and you have to learn from your mistake.. Have a follow through.. When you release the ball make sure your arm goes up or you may hurt your arm permanently in the future.. I hope this will help you bowl better..

Diary of an Insomniac page 165

2010-06-22T03:25:00.005+08:00

It's now.. 12 hours.. since she said goodbye to me..... A very LONG 12 hours... Still.. So many questions remained in my mind..

Life is.. not interesting anymore.. Nor is it meaningful.. Nor even pleasant.. I.. used to look upon everything as try to something interesting about them.. But.. somehow.. I just can't.. How can I concentrate when everything seems... meaningless?..

Part of me has disappeared.. The very part that made me become an optimist..

Looking forward to tomorrow.. Having confidence at anything I do.. Always do thing wholeheartedly.. Working hard on the present.. Making the past as a lesson to never make the same mistake in the future.. Always expecting the best possible outcome from any given situation.. Seizing opportunity as they come.. The best part of being who I really am..

And now, the opportunity that lies upon me is her.. I mean.. was.. She has made herself clear that she's not an opportunity anymore..

If only.. I could clear her doubts..

If only.. I could hear her thoughts..

If only.. I was less persistent on getting her attention..

If only.. I understand how she really feels..

If only.. I knew what she went through...

I have made a vow.. And I intend to keep it.. One way or another.. Be it directly or indirectly.. I'll be there for her... As long as she needs me.. Where or when...

Here's something for her..

I got the call today, I didn't wanna hear
But I knew that it would come
An old true friend of ours was talkin' on the phone
She said you found someone
And I thought of all the bad luck,
And the struggles we went through
And how I lost me and you lost you
What are these voices outside love's open door
Make us throw off our contentment
And beg for something more?

I'm learning to live without you now
But I miss you sometimes
The more I know, the less I understand
All the things I thought I knew, I'm learning again
I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But my will gets weak
And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

These times are so uncertain
There's a yearning undefined
...People filled with rage
We all need a little tenderness
How can love survive in such a graceless age
The trust and self-assurance that can lead to happiness
They're the very things we kill, I guess
Pride and competition cannot fill these empty arms
And the work I put between us,
Doesn't keep me warm

I'm learning to live without you now
But I miss you, Baby
The more I know, the less I understand
All the things I thought I figured out, I have to learn again

I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But everything changes
And my friends seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

There are people in your life who've come and gone
They let you down and hurt your pride
Better put it all behind you; life goes on
You keep carrin' that anger, it'll eat you inside

I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But my will gets weak
And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

So... Will you forgive me?.. If you're reading this..

Dear My Secret Lover..

2010-06-21T01:22:00.008+08:00

I just wanna say that..

I love you more than anything in the world though no one knows about it.. I'll still love you with all my heart.. Even though you're just my secret lover..

You can be sure that you are my true love.. The one I've been looking for all my life.. I will give the rest of my love only for you..

I do love you N.. I really do.. Though it took me some time to realize it.. But the feelings are true.. No doubt about it..

N.. For as long as I'm with you.. Nothing is impossible.. I will do everything I can to make you happy.. So please, be mine...

Sincerely,
Naz..

And so, I dedicate these 2 songs for you..

It did happen huh?

2010-06-20T01:33:00.006+08:00

I know when he's been on your mind
That distant look is in your eyes
I thought with time you'd realized
It's over, over
It's not the way I choose to live
And something, somewhere got to give
As sharing this relationship gets older, older
You know I'd fight for you
But how can I fight someone who isn't even there
I've had the rest of you
Now I want the best of you
I don't care if that's not fair

Cause I want it all
Or nothing at all
There's nowhere left to fall
When you've reached the bottom
It's now or never
Is it all
Or are we just friends
Is this how it ends
With a simple telephone call
You leave me here with nothing at all

There are times it seems to me
I'm sharing you in memories
I feel it in my heart
But I don't show it, show it
Then there's times you look at me
As though I'm all that you can see
Those times I don't believe it's right
I know it, know it
Don't make me promises
Baby you never did know how to keep them well
I've had the rest of you
Now I want the best of you
It's time to show and tell

Cause I want it all
Or nothing at all
There's nowhere left to fall
When you've reached the bottom
It's now or never
Is it all
Or are we just friends
Is this how it ends
With a simple telephone call
You leave me here
With nothing...

Cause you and I
Could lose it all if you've
Got no more room
No room inside for me in your life

Cause I want it all
Or nothing at all
There's nowhere left to fall
It's now or never

Is it all
Or nothing at all
There's nowhere left to fall
When you've reached the bottom
It's now or never

Is it all
Or are we just friends
Is this how it ends
With a simple telephone call
You leave me here
With nothing at all

Somehow.. I think this would be the perfect song to describe the situation I'm in right now.. I know that I might be greedy.. But really.. I do not want to share you with anyone at all.. I love you.. And I know that you do love me too.. But to you, I'm more suited to be just friends.. Right?

It ended with a telephone call.. Literally.. Nuff said.. Friends.. Well.. It might be better than nothing.. At least I can still be there for you... When you needs me..

The Night..

2010-06-20T00:00:00.001+08:00

It's gonna one loooooooooooooooonnnnnnnnnnnngggggggg night tonight.. I got a hunch about it...

It Must Have Been Love.. But It's Over Now...

2010-06-19T18:52:00.008+08:00

So.. Here I am bloggers.. Heartbroken.. Again..

No matter how much she says she loves me.. Her action proved otherwise.. I really.. Don't understand.. Every single time I find love, and love abandoned me.. What am I supposed to do?

All the promises.. Mean nothing to me now.. They are just words.. Words that are meant to sooth.. Only for that purpose.. Said without any intention to be kept.. I should have seen it coming..

Lay a whisper on my pillow
Leave the winter on the ground
I wake up lonely, is there a silence
In the bedroom and all around

Touch me now, I close my eyes
And dream away...

It must have been love, but it's over now
It must have been good, but I lost it somehow
It must have been love, but it's over now
From the moment we touched till the time had run out

Make believing we're together
That I'm sheltered by your heart
But in and outside I turn to water
Like a teardrop in your palm

And it's a hard winter's day
I dream away...

It must have been love, but it's over now
It was all that I wanted, now I'm living without
It must have been love, but it's over now
It's where the water flows, it's where the wind blows

It must have been love, but it's over now
It must have been good, but I lost it somehow
It must have been love, but it's over now
From the moment we touched till the time had run out

Now.. There's nothing I can do about it.. And there's nothing to be done by anyone.. I am just a guy who wants to love and to be loved..

3 words.. Truly.. Madly.. Deeply..

2010-06-16T02:56:00.003+08:00

3 words to explain it, 3 simple words.. ^_^

I'll be your dream
I'll be your wish
I'll be your fantasy.
I'll be your hope
I'll be your love
Be everything that you need.
I love you more with every breath
Truly madly deeply do..
I will be strong I will be faithful
'Cos I'm counting on a new beginning.
A reason for living.
A deeper meaning.

I want to stand with you on a mountain.
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever.
Until the sky falls down on me...

And when the stars are shining brightly
In the velvet sky,
I'll make a wish
Send it to heaven
Then make you want to cry..
The tears of joy
For all the pleasure and the certainty.
That we're surrounded
By the comfort and protection of..
The highest power.
In lonely hours.
The tears devour you..

I want to stand with you on a mountain,
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever,
Until the sky falls down on me...

Oh can't you see it baby?
You don't have to close your eyes
'Cos it's standing right before you.
All that you need will surely come...

I'll be your dream
I'll be your wish
I'll be your fantasy.
I'll be your hope
I'll be your love
Be everything that you need.
I'll love you more with every breath
Truly madly deeply do...

I'm Sorry...

2010-06-15T13:02:00.003+08:00

“I’m sorry.” Two simple words and yet two of the hardest to say. We easily utter them in response to trivial matters like accidentally jostling a stranger on the subway or giving the cashier the wrong change. Yet in important matters and to those who mean the most to us, we can find ourselves practically choking on the words. But the inability to apologize can critically wound all of our relationships, from home to work. Learning how to properly apologize is a necessary step in moving from boy to man.

Why We Don’t Apologize

Pride. Apologizing can be particularly hard for men because it involves the admittance of fault. It’s hard to say that we messed up. That we were wrong. Our pride gets in the way.

Embarrassment. If we messed up royally, doing something truly boneheaded even though we knew better, it can be difficult to talk about it to the person we hurt or let down. We feel stupid and would rather pretend like it didn’t happen.

Anger. Things that need apologizing for are rarely a one way street (more on this later). We probably did something wrong, but the other person probably did too. And sometimes our anger over how they offended us is so great that we justify what we did and can’t get past it to apologize.

The antidote to all 3 obstacles? Humility. The reason we put up these walls is that we have an overinflated view of our true selves. We’re always right; we always have it together. But it ain’t true. We’re human. We mess up sometimes. You have to accept your imperfection as a part of life. Suppressing it will cut you off from others. Embracing it will allow you to grow as a man.

When to Apologize

Even when it’s not fully your fault. There is a breed of man who will not apologize unless he feels 100% at fault for something. “But it’s not my fault!” is his battle cry. He’s not at fault for throwing away an important document at work because no one specifically told him to hold onto it. He’s not at fault for hurting his girlfriend’s feelings because she shouldn’t have been listening to his conversation with his friends.

But almost no situation is 100% one person’s fault. If your wife flew off the handle and called you some cutting things for seemingly no reason, it’s not because she’s just an ice princess; she’s hurt because you’ve been working 80 hour weeks and not spending enough time with her.

Even if the fault split is something like 1%/99%, you still need to work hard to humble yourself and come to an understanding of what that 1% is rooted in. Don’t live your life as though every day you’re pleading your case before an imaginary court, presenting evidence for why you are not at fault and are innocent as charged. It’s not as important to be right as it is to have healthy relationships with others. Would you rather be right than give up your relationship with someone? Would you rather be right than lift the hurt feelings from another? Being self-satisfied in your justice offers little benefit but the feeling of smugness. And smugness won’t keep you warm at night.

You don’t have to apologize for what truly wasn’t your fault, but you can find the things, no matter how small, that you could have handled better. Once you apologize for those things, that will get the ball rolling for the other person to own up to their mistakes. Don’t let pride stop you from being the bigger person and taking the initiative.

Even when you haven’t been caught. As a boy, did you ever break something and then run away, hoping that no one would notice, and that if they did, they wouldn’t connect the crime back to you? This is how a child handles his mistakes. A man owns up to his mistakes and offenses whether or not he thinks he will be held accountable.

Quickly. Apologize as soon as you can after making a mistake or committing an offense. The longer you wait, the more resentment is going to build up on both sides, the harder it will be to make the first move, and the more awkward the situation will become. Be a man and nip it in the bud.

When Not to Apologize

For your beliefs. If you offend someone by standing up for your beliefs because you failed to debate like a gentleman and ended up being snarky, attacking the person personally, or generally acting like an ass, then you should apologize for your boorish behavior. However, if you’ve made a completely respectful argument in favor of your position and a person is simply offended because of the nature of your beliefs, then you should never apologize for that. Don’t be sorry for what you hold near and dear to your heart.

For not meeting unreasonable expectations. You know this guy. His girlfriend expects him to kowtow to her every wish and treat her like a princess 24/7. When he fails to do this, she expects him to grovel in repentance. This isn’t being sensitive, it’s being a whipped weenie.

For everything. This man apologizes for his appearance, for things that aren’t his fault that no one is saying are his fault, and for perceived shortcomings that no one notices until he brings them up. And he keeps on apologizing. Over and over again when everyone else has moved on. Being a compulsive apologizer is highly emasculating and instead of getting you into people’s good graces as you might assume, will simply erode their respect for you.

How to Apologize

Write it if you can’t say it. Sometimes our embarrassment or pride prevents us from going in person to apologize to someone. While a face to face apology is always ideal, if you absolutely can’t do it, then it’s better to get it out then not do it at all. And sometimes a letter or note is actually a superior medium to talking because it allows you to express all of your feelings without forgetting what you want to say or running the risk of setting off another argument.

Use humor when appropriate. Some self-deprecating humor can break the tension and cause you both to laugh. I’ve found that drawing little cartoons of me and my mishap can instantly dissipate my wife’s anger. Note that I said, when appropriate. If you cheated on your girlfriend, don’t crack jokes or make cartoons about it. “And see in this panel, that’s me making out with your best friend.”

Be sincere. This is the cardinal rule of apologies. An insincere apology is in some ways worse than no apology at all. The person’s hurt over your offense will merely be compounded by their anger at your hypocrisy. An insincere apology may take the form of saying you’re sorry but saying it in such a way that your lack of contrition is patently manifest. Another form is the famous “I’m sorry you’re sorry” apology. This apology admits no fault but pretends like saying you’re sorry that the person was hurt or is angry is still pretty big of you. Don’t bother; it will make the person want to stab with you a trident.

Take complete responsibility. Never, ever make any excuses while you’re apologizing. They instantly ruin the weight and sincerity of your confession. Don’t use any “buts.” As in “I’m really sorry that happened, but….” A man takes full responsibility for his mistakes.

Express your understanding of why you were wrong and the weight of your mistake. A person wants to know that you fully understand the seriousness of the situation, that you have thought through exactly why what you did was wrong and the full consequences of your actions. Nobody wants to hear an apology from someone who clearly doesn’t know why they’re in the wrong but feels like apologizing is what they’re “supposed” to do.

Offer to make restitution. This is a key part of the apology process. You should almost always offer to try in any way you can to make up for your misdeed. This obviously isn’t always possible. If you break your wife’s 5th generation family heirloom vase, you can’t go to Target and buy a replacement. But if a situation can be fixed and rectified, that you should pledge to do whatever it takes to do so.

Pledge better behavior in the future. Notice that I said pledge and not promise. While some would argue that if you’re really sorry, you’ll never make the same mistake again, our failings as human beings dictates otherwise. I might be truly sorry for losing my temper on someone, but I’m pretty sure that no matter how hard I try, it’s probably going to happen again somewhere down the line. When you promise someone that something is never going to happen again, you’re setting yourself up for a huge rift to develop if it does. The person will be justifiably doubly hurt, because after all, “You promised!” There are of course some things that you can be almost 100% sure you’ll never do again, and if you feel absolutely confident in that, then make a promise. But generally you should simply pledge that you’re going to be working hard on fixing whatever personality or behavioral faults led to your current offense. You can promise that you’re going to be making an effort to change and turn things around.

Prove your contrition with your actions. In the end, words will matter very little if your actions don’t match them. After you’ve apologized, stop dwelling on it. Simply start acting in a way that demonstrates the sincerity of your apology.

Move on. Once you’ve given your sincere apology, don’t apologize again. Having you continually apologize may be what the offended party thinks they want from you and it may make them feel better in the short term. But in the long term, it’s going to ruin the relationship. If you continue to grovel then you’ll always be in the inferior position instead of having the person treat you like an equal. Deep down they won’t be respecting you as a man. Either the person accepts your apology or they don’t. If they do, then there’s no need to keep groveling. If they don’t, then the person doesn’t trust you and the relationship has other problems that need to be fixed.

Blind..

2010-06-15T12:21:00.005+08:00

I was young but I wasn't naive
I watched helpless as he turned around to leave
and still I have the pain I have to carry
a past so deep that even you could not bury if you tried

after all this time
I never thought we'd be here
never thought we'd be here
when my love for you was blind
but I couldn't make you see it
couldn't make you see it
that I loved you more than you'll ever know
a part of me died when I let you go

I would fall asleep
only in hopes of dreaming
that everything would be like is was before
but nights like this it seems are slowly fleeting
they disappear as reality is crashing to the floor

after all this time
I never thought we'd be here
never thought we'd be here
when my love for you was blind
but I couldn't make you see it
couldn't make you see it
that I loved you more than you'll ever know
a part of me died when I let you go

after all this time
would you ever wanna leave it
maybe you could not believe it
that my love for you was blind
but I couldn't make you see it
couldn't make you see it
that I loved you more than you will ever know
a part of me died when I let you go
and I loved you more than you'll ever know
a part of me dies when I let you go

-------------------------------------------------------

Yesterday I asked you.. If I went missing, what would you do?

Your answer was "nothing.. because I will always find you in my heart"

And so.. I guess the only place for me is in your heart.. And not by your side..

I once asked you.. Before you got serious with him.. Why not be with me instead.. But you replied you don't wanna lose a friend like me..

A friend.. Maybe I'm just fated to be just her friend..

And it is a fate that I intend to change!

Diary Of An Insomniac Page 145

2010-06-10T04:08:00.002+08:00

A few things have clouded my mind since last night.. And I have yet to get a clear view on things.. And then, suddenly I come across this pic...

Instinctively, this picture somehow.. I can't get this picture out of my head..

Baik Baik Sayang

2010-06-08T02:47:00.005+08:00

Aku tak ingin kau menangis bersedih
Sudahi air mata darimu
Yang aku ingin arti hadir diriku
Kan menghapus dukamu sayang

Karena bagiku kau kehormatanku
Dengarkan dengarkan aku

Hanya satu pintaku untukmu dan hidupku
Baik baik sayang ada aku untukmu
Hanya satu pintaku di siang dan malammu
Baik baik sayang karna aku untukmu

Semua keinginan akan aku lakukan
Sekuat semampuku sayang
Karena bagiku kau kehormatanku
Dengarkan dengarkan aku

Hanya satu pintaku untukmu dan hidupku
Baik baik sayang ada aku untukmu
Hanya satu pintaku di siang dan malammu
Baik baik sayang karna aku untukmu

Ngee~ Thanks to a certain someone, 070610 will be one of the most memorable day ever... It's simply hard to explain by words.. But to make things short, I have finally said what I need to say since a long time ago, and so did she.. I remembered 3 days ago, when I met her mother for the second time... She said to her friend..

"This is her best guy friend.. He's not his boyfriend yet"

I was speechless when she said that.. And at the same time, I started to wonder.. Yet she said.. Hmm.. Does that mean anything? I guess it's for her to know and for me to find out.. :P

I continued my stroll down memory lane.. I noticed that.. Every time I have nothing to do, I'd give her a text / buzz / call.. Every time I needed someone to talk to, she would be my first choice.. Every time I feel mischievous, she would be my target.. And furthermore, when she said that she needed me, I'd stop whatever I'm doing or finish it as soon as possible, making myself free for the session..

No matter what I do, she'll be there for me, and no matter what she does,

I will always be there for her..

This is my vow, until the end of time...

150 juta

2010-06-03T12:00:00.003+08:00

This is one of the sweetest songs that I've known..

Untuk kali keseratus lima puluh juta
Mereka tanyakan engkau soalan yang sama
"Eh kenapa kau masih lagi mahukan dia?"
"Apa kau buta, apa kau pura-pura suka"

Di seratus lima puluh juta kali itu
Di depan semua engkau tarik tangan aku
Yang sedang buat muka kosong tak ambil tahu
Sambil ketawa engkau bilang satu per satu

"Dia mungkin bengis seperti singa"
"Tapi dia nangis tonton cerita Korea"
"Dia mungkin keras bila bersuara"
"Tapi dia jelas, jujur apa adanya"

"Aku lagi kenal dia"

Dah lebih seratus lima puluh juta kali
Aku pesan padamu apa yang bakal jadi
Engkau dan aku ada mungkin tidak serasi
Engkau sangat manis, aku ini pula dawai besi

Di setiap seratus lima puluh jutanya
Aku pun dalam hati semacam tak percaya
Apa kau lihat pada aku jujurkan saja
Terus kau cubit dagu aku, sambil berkata

"Saya mungkin baran tak kira masa"
"Tapi saya tahan kalau yang salah saya"
"Saya mungkin saja keras kepala"
"Tapi saya manja bila kita berdua"

"Saya kenal sayang saya"

Buat apa dicerita
Bahagia kita rasa
Biar tak dipercaya
Peduli orang kata

Baju ronyok tak apa
Asal pakai selesa
Berkilau tak bermakna
Kalau hati tak ada

Aku lebih bengis dari sang naga
Tapi bisa nangis semata demi cinta
Suaraku keras tak berbahasa
Kerna aku rimas gedik mengada-ngada

Aku mudah baran tidak semena
Mana boleh tahan angin cemburu buta
Dan aku sengaja tunjuk keras kepala
Aku punya manja, kau saja boleh rasa

Rahsia kita berdua..

“How To Get A Girlfriend”

2010-05-30T05:00:00.003+08:00

Hmm..

Is it true?

Maybe..

Is there really a way to get a girlfriend?

Of course!

What do I need to do?

First of all, let me elaborate on the topic :D

A lot of guys wonder “Is there anything I should do DIFFERENTLY if I'd like to turn a casual date into a girlfriend?”

The reason why I'd like to address this question is I think many guys wonder if they should do something DIFFERENT if they'd like to pursue a relationship with a woman as opposed to just dating her a few times for short-term fun..

I personally think that women have a basic program when it comes to men that are potential romantic interests.. It says, “If he chases me, run. If he doesn't chase me, chase him.”

Of course, this is a big generalization, and it doesn't always hold true but it's true enough in most situations..

If you call a woman all the time, she'll probably not call you.. If you take a woman to dinner 4 times in a week, she probably won't be inviting you over for dinner at her place..

On the other hand, if you go out with a woman and she has a GREAT time with you, then you don't call for a couple of days, or maybe you call once for 3 minutes to tell her that you're busy and make plans for a few days later, she will be thinking about you ALL THE TIME..

If you do seem like you're into a relationship, then a woman has a much bigger decision to make, and will be taking all kinds of things into consideration; little gestures will take on new meaning..

If you're ONLY looking for a “relationship”, then this will come across in all your dealings with women.. You'll be asking different questions, answering questions differently, and playing for the long term.. This can create all kinds of problems when done "too much too soon"..

My personal experience is that women will act much more “real” if you don't put any pressure on the situation.. It's when you're acting like this is either “marriage or we're breaking up” right from the beginning that you're ASKING FOR BIG TROUBLE..

Another key point I've realized is that JUST BECAUSE I AM OR AM NOT LOOKING FOR A RELATIONSHIP DOESN'T MEAN THAT I'M GOING TO KEEP FEELING THAT SAME WAY A WEEK FROM NOW.

I've had times in my life when I've been single and thinking, “I'm not into a relationship right now”, and then I met a fantastic woman that changed my mind.

I've also had times when I wanted a relationship, but had more fun being single, so I didn't pursue one.

Best idea: Approach the whole topic with the attitude of “I'm open to whatever great opportunities present themselves.”

When you're with a woman you've just met, don't put the pressure on. Lean back. Be cool.

(ESPECIALLY if the woman is unusually attractive… attractive women are used to men falling for them too quickly, and this turns them off)

If the topic comes up say, “Well, I'm single now, and if I meet a woman that I really like, then we'll see what happens.” A lot of guys don't want to come across as being “afraid of commitment.” But don't go overboard to prove that you're not, because you'll come across as a Wuss-Bag if you try too hard.. A woman won't run away from you if you're not calling her 10 times a day.. In fact, she'll PROBABLY run if you DO call her too often..

Another perspective I have is that A LOT of relationship problems are the result of people who don't know each other, getting involved too deeply and too quickly.. This is another great thing to MENTION if a woman pushes you on the topic..

If you REALLY like her, call her a couple of times a week and see her every week or two for a few months.. Get to know her better..

And in the meantime, if you want to see other women, go for it.. Do what feels right to you..

But, always remember, don't turn into a WUSS if you get into a relationship.. If you do, you'll either find yourself being dumped or wake up one day with a ring through your nose and a leash around your neck, and an unhappy woman in your life to boot..

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.. ;)

" Hadiah Birthday Untuk Alisya"

2010-05-27T04:21:00.008+08:00

Hmm.. Baru sedar kene tag dlm contest ni.. Sowi ye cik doryn sbb lambat buat.. Huhu.. Still don't know what the contest is about and what are the prizes.. Too sleepy to read so I'm just gonna follow her example.. Pick a few presents for the baby's 1st birthday..

Taken from.. www.eyriqazz.com
which is called "Great Teacher Onizuka"
The idea of this contest is to select the best present from the parents and you must give out the reason why..

This is the picture of the baby..

To be able to give presents for a baby, I must first picture myself as a father with a baby daughter..

For starters, I'd give her these..

It's a cute sheep :D

Reasons? The soft, fluffy sheep is the baby's perfect nighttime companion to help soothe them to sleep in a safe, calming and effortless way.. A sound box tucked safely inside of Sleep Sheep lulls babies to sleep with soft sounds from nature and the reassuring sound of a mother's heartbeat.. Sleep Sheep's soothing sounds are an audio pacifier that can calm even the fussiest babies to sleep.. When babies sleep better, parents sleep better.. Correct? :D

What would birthdays be without a birthday hat? :D

The first birthday is the most memorable one and this fine cake will make it even more so.. Finely embroidered happy birthday logo and one single candle.. Crafted of luxurious velvet, this hat is sure to please.. :D

So now we have a birthday hat, and a sheep.. What else is missing.. Hmmm.. I know!

A pair of baby booties foot rattles and a wrist rattles! :D
What else do a baby need for her birthday other than loud noises to make her become the center of attraction? :P

Thus, there you have it, a complete set.. A hat, a pair of booties, a wrist rattles and a toy :D

One of the rules is.
I have to tag 3 people for this contest..
The three persons are:
Nadd(Kiddo), Daniel(Deevon), Diana(Shanny)

Lastly,
My fav entry at Eyriqazz.com is
Contest | Hadiah birthday untuk Alisya!

Types.. You're Not Her Type? Awww

2010-05-27T02:52:00.010+08:00

I was talking with some of my friends and one of them gave me this question..

"What if a woman, in the conversation with you, states she does not like a certain type of guy; for example she says she likes tall guys but one happens to be short.."

My answer is simple.. If you behave as if what a woman thinks of you is important, then you'll be very likely to do something to make her not feel attraction towards you..

Remember, ATTRACTION isn't a "logical" process.. It really doesn't make very much sense (until you understand how it works, that is)..

Just because a woman SAYS that she doesn't "like" a certain type of guy doesn't mean that she can't feel a POWERFUL ATTRACTION for a guy of this "type"..

Understand?

ATTRACTION is an emotional and physical RESPONSE..

A "type" is a PREFERENCE..

They are two totally DIFFERENT things..

Here's a good example: Women are universally more interested in taller men.. If you ask a woman what "type" of "height" ISN'T her type, she'll say something like "short guys" or "guys who are shorter than me" etc..

I have NEVER met a woman in my entire life who said "I like shorter guys".. NEVER!!

But guess what?

I have at least 4 or 5 friends who are in the 5'2" to 5'6" range that are UNBELIEVABLE with women.. They ALL date beautiful women who are taller than them..

So what's going on here?

ATTRACTION is what's going on..

So, when you ask me how to use a Cocky & Funny line to turn a "perceived deficit" around, the FIRST thing I have to say is, "Stop thinking of it as a deficit"..

First, you need to stop caring what a woman thinks of you ALL-TOGETHER..

Completely.. Totally.. 100%..

If you care what she thinks of you, then you're probably going to start acting like a total WUSS, and you're going to screw things up INSTANTLY..

Women don't feel ATTRACTION for men who look to them for approval..

Women feel ATTRACTION for men who are strong, independent, and not affected by the opinions of others..

As a note, you can learn an entire SYSTEM for overcoming these "mental limitations"... and you can also learn how to build a rock-solid self-image that will be INCREDIBLY attractive to women..

So, based on this new perspective, here are a few ways that you could handle a situation like this one...

1) NOT CARE AT ALL

One of the things you could do is to not address the comment at all... as if it didn't even exist.

A mistake many people make is thinking that they MUST take every communication that another person takes seriously and then RESPOND to it.

Not so.

You don't have to do ANYTHING if you don't want to.

So, if a woman says, "I like tall guys", you can just act as if it had never been said and continue with your conversation, getting her email/number, or whatever.

By the way, this concept can be EXTREMELY useful in other situations as well. For instance, if a woman starts getting upset about something and being overly dramatic, one great thing to do is NOTHING AT ALL. Just sit there and don't respond at all. Then, when it settles down a little, just continue your conversation as if nothing had happened (Oh, and stop hanging out with dramatic, overly-emotional women too, you dork!).

2) BRING IT UP BEFORE HER

In this case, you're talking about height. One way to deal with this is to bring it up before she does.

As soon as you start talking say, "Well, you're taller than me... I'm over it, are you yet?"

This says a few things. It says that you know what's going on... it says you're confident... and it shows that you're not afraid to deal with it.

It also addresses the issue in such a way that you'll know where she stands on it.

If she just CAN'T get past it, she'll tell you.

3) MAKE IT HER PROBLEM

Here's a place to use Cocky & Funny. - You might say, "Wow, you're kind of a freak. I think something like 1% of women are as tall as you. It must suck trying to find nice pants, huh? You have to wear all those weird pants made for freaks and
stuff."

Or, if she's talking about a trait that she's attracted to, point out the negative sides of that trait in a Cocky & Funny way.

Maybe she says, "I like men who know how to treat a lady special, take her nice places, and who pay for everything to show that they're a gentleman".

You might say, "Oh, so what you're telling me is that you like men who basically pay for your attention with money and gifts... how romantic."

...The one thing that you'll find at the bottom of all the ideas that I've just presented is FIRST OF ALL, NOT CARING WHAT SHE THINKS OF YOU.

I know that it's a paradox... you obviously want her to like you, but you have to not care what she thinks of you.

Well, get over it.

Women aren't attracted to men who are APPROVAL SEEKERS.

And if a woman throws out a comment like, "I like tall guys", you must first learn to NOT CARE, and not let it impact you emotionally.

Then you'll be free to redirect the conversation and decide if she's the kind of woman that YOU would like to go out with.

By the way, when you are interacting with a woman, one of the MOST IMPORTANT factors that will determine whether or not she will feel ATTRACTION for you is YOUR BELIEFS AND HOW YOU COMMUNICATE THEM.

And you are constantly communicating your beliefs with your body language, voice tone, words, topics, questions, and everything else you do.

Have you heard?

2010-05-20T06:59:00.003+08:00

A man's ethical behavior should be based effectually on sympathy, education, and social ties no religious basis is necessary.

Man would indeed be in a poor way if he had to be restrained by fear of punishment and hope of reward after death..

Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent.
It takes a touch of genius and a lot of courage to move in the opposite direction