While you remain blissfully unmarried, you'll be happy to know that some things you are not required to share with your significant other. Good news, huh? Whether you're into sharing or not, you're entirely entitled to set ground rules when it comes to certain things and what's more, it'll likely yield a healthier and more mature relationship. Here are just five (I am sure there are more) things you should not share with your boyfriend or girlfriend. 1. Money This is a tricky one, especially if you've got joint expenses like a pet, bills or even an apartment. So before you talk about any plans to share expenses, consider first that money is one of the leading causes of divorce in America today. Ask yourself why. Oh, you're not married? So, why bother with one of the most stressful issues married couples deal with. While sharing money isn't a definitive "no can do," it's something to be carefully examined and not rushed into. 2. Passwords If you're young and in love then you're probably thinking that your significant other volunteering their password is the best way to gain trust. No - not unless they've violated before; in that case, it's one of the first things I'd tell you to do. You may or may not have anything to hide. Your inbox could consist of scoops on the latest Idol outcast, but it's your right to keep it to yourself. 3. Facebook Account No, not Facebook passwords, but Facebook accounts. You probably wouldn't believe it if I told you but there are actually some couples out there who have joint Facebook or other social networking accounts. Gag, right? It's more harmful than one would think. What you're telling the world is that you're one person. Social networks are meant to substantiate identity. The healthiest relationships are those made up of two individuals. 4. A Best Friend Having mutual friends is ordinary, but if you both set your stakes in the same best friend, issues can arise. Trio outings can be fun and dandy, but during arguments things can get competitive. Going to the same person for comfort or a venting session could leave the third party in an awkward situation. You may even force them to take sides! Then you've turned a tiny argument into World War III. Have your mutual friends, but if at all possible, have your own best friends or leave the one best friend out of it. 5. Conversations about Your Ex Hey, let the past be the past. Easier said than done, of course, but unrelenting conversations about your ex, whether positive or negative, can drive a wedge between you and yours. You're in a new relationship now, let go of the past and make the most of this one. If you can't, then you probably shouldn't be a new relationship.No worries, not everything is off limits. Couples who share everyday things like razors and toothbrushes find it completely normal and not damaging to their relationship at all. Sharing allows you to open up to the other in unspoken ways and can only add to a relationship. Just the same, setting your boundaries fosters respect of the other individual also adding to the relationship.
Sunday, June 24, 2012
5 Things Unmarried Couples Should NOT Share
As taken from 5 Things Unmarried Couples Should NOT Share on Yahoo!..
Self-Respect
You're handsome. You're single. You have a great job. To your mom, aunts, and neighbors it makes no sense...how can a great guy like you still be single? They don't get it.
YOU have a simple explanation for it. Women don't like nice guys. Women like jerks. So as long as you're a nice guy, women are going to conveniently stick you in the "friend zone" within minutes of meeting you...and we all know there's no coming back once you're in the "friend zone..."
But is it because you're too nice?
Or is it because you don't respect yourself?
Male, female...it doesn't matter. In fact, I've watched men pass over "nice girls" for women who treat them badly. Traditionally we've all believed that it falls into the "we always want what we can't have" category but really it goes deeper than that.
It all has to do with YOU respecting YOURSELF.
Somebody who respects himself shows it. He walks with confidence, and when he meets someone new he projects the image that he can take her or leave her. If she wants his company, great...if not, her loss. He'll just move on and find someone who will appreciate him.
Nothing could be sexier than that.
Self-respect. If you don't respect you...how can you expect her to? If you consistently allow a woman to treat you badly, what will happen? she'll keep treating you badly. She'll walk all over you because you've already proven to her you're a doormat. Meanwhile, you'll stand around scratching your head, puzzling over why women always ignore nice guys.
Is it something you're sending out? Is it something you're doing, early on, that lets her know you have no self-respect? Maybe it's a little bit of both. Whatever the case, until you make the decision that you aren't going to be a doormat for women anymore...until you decide, once and for all, that you aren't going to settle for less than you deserve, you'll continue to attract people who walk all over you.
And yes...every bit of this advice applies to women too.
YOU have a simple explanation for it. Women don't like nice guys. Women like jerks. So as long as you're a nice guy, women are going to conveniently stick you in the "friend zone" within minutes of meeting you...and we all know there's no coming back once you're in the "friend zone..."
But is it because you're too nice?
Or is it because you don't respect yourself?
Male, female...it doesn't matter. In fact, I've watched men pass over "nice girls" for women who treat them badly. Traditionally we've all believed that it falls into the "we always want what we can't have" category but really it goes deeper than that.
It all has to do with YOU respecting YOURSELF.
Somebody who respects himself shows it. He walks with confidence, and when he meets someone new he projects the image that he can take her or leave her. If she wants his company, great...if not, her loss. He'll just move on and find someone who will appreciate him.
Nothing could be sexier than that.
Self-respect. If you don't respect you...how can you expect her to? If you consistently allow a woman to treat you badly, what will happen? she'll keep treating you badly. She'll walk all over you because you've already proven to her you're a doormat. Meanwhile, you'll stand around scratching your head, puzzling over why women always ignore nice guys.
Is it something you're sending out? Is it something you're doing, early on, that lets her know you have no self-respect? Maybe it's a little bit of both. Whatever the case, until you make the decision that you aren't going to be a doormat for women anymore...until you decide, once and for all, that you aren't going to settle for less than you deserve, you'll continue to attract people who walk all over you.
And yes...every bit of this advice applies to women too.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)