"I need you"

Sometimes, how nice it would be if the person you care about, says that they really need you.. You'll feel the importance, the significance of yourself in their life..

It would definitely bring the person a very big smile, when you say that you need them.. Think about it, that person might be sad, annoyed, or even angry, but then, when you, someone important to them, says that you need them, it would definitely cheer them up..

However, do keep in mind that, if you do this to almost everyone, it might have a reversed effect.. Especially if you do it to the wrong person.. Never and NEVER do this to your one-sided love.. At least be sure that they don't already have someone else in mind...

Good luck in making someone's day brighter ;)

Anxiety kills ;)

Before sharing with you the secrets to becoming a vibrant, supremely self confident person who is ultra attractive to the opposite gender, I have a few questions that I'd like to ask you....

Have you ever seen someone from across the room that you really like, or who you'd really love to meet.... but were too overwhelmed by fear and nervousness to go over and start a conversation?

Have you ever felt like you don't deserve the kind of person that you are REALLY attracted to, and as a result always settle for second best?

Have you ever felt yourself shaking with self-consciousness when you are talking to someone that you've got a crush on? Lost your words? Can't be your best self?

Have you ever been in a relationship where you got emotionally insecure and ended up driving your partner away by your clinginess and insecurity?

Have you ever fallen in love with someone before you've even dated them and got jealous and upset when they go out with someone else?

When you're not self confident, then you get nervous and act differently at times when you feel stressed or need to be at your best.. For example on a date, or when you talk to someone you're attracted to..

If your confidence betrays you at these vital times, then you may well struggle to make your life turn out the way you want it to.. Confidence is attractive, and without it, it's difficult to attract a really good catch.

Why?

People base their assumptions of you on what they know of you. That's why first impressions can be so hard to change.. If that's all they know of you, then as far as the other person is concerned, that image they have in their head of you IS YOU..

So if you meet someone you are attracted to and act nervous, fumble your words, and run out of things to say.. Then as far as the other person knows, you are someone who is nervous, fumbles their words and runs out of things to say..

Of course a little nervousness with a smile can be endearing and can even help you, but if you can't let your best self shine through soon and if you end up getting so nervous that you just want to get out of there, then it's hard to see that person you like ever be attracted to you..

Also, it's really unfortunate that people may assume from your shy or nervous behavior that you simply don't like being around them.. They pick up on your discomfort. They may end up becoming quite negative towards you as a result, because they think that you've rejected them first—when in reality you just didn't know what to say or do..

Reasons? Simply because...

Anxiety that you may never be able to attract and keep the kind of person that you REALLY want. If you've ever felt this kind of anxiety then you'll know PRECISELY what I am talking about.. It plays on your mind all the time..

Anxiety that the person that you want isn't interested in you, or is interested in someone else. If you've ever been through this kind of mental struggle, then you'll probably also be aware that it often becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy that could well turn out far different if you didn't create all this internal tension by playing these mind games with yourself.. Find out how to stop these anxious thoughts and how to replace them with positive ones!

Anxiety about what to say next. Do you ever suddenly freeze up when you're around a person who you're attracted to? Perhaps you get the exact opposite and talk too much, too fast.. Either way, be yourself and wash the anxiety away when talking to the opposite gender..

Anxiety about what you look like. Do you worry that you don't look attractive enough to attract a hottie? Do you feel like you can't attract the person of your dreams until you lose x pounds? Or until you get a tan? Feel great, exactly as you are, because attractiveness comes from within first!

Love is like a Drug?

 Love of family, and platonic love, are not so susceptible to scientific probing.. But since my first disastrous infatuation with a girl I believed to be my eternal soul mate, I've been convinced that romantic love is a profoundly physical rather than spiritual phenomenon..

In romantic love, our neurons and our hormones, our brains and our blood pressure, our stomachs and hearts, are in a state of upheaval.. And if we check out the behavior of our close primate relatives, we can detect links between human bonding of the romantic love type, and evolutionary survival pressures.. In fact, there's no area of physiology, or behavioral and evolutionary biology, that doesn't boast an explanatory claim to romantic love..

The feeling that romantic love is akin to being "besotted" lies deep in western folk memory.. From the ancient Greek myth of the centaur Nessus and his dangerous love potions, to E M Forster's lovesick Maurice's complaint that he is "drugged", our forebears have characterized romantic love as a potent substance.. But is it generated within, or outside, the body? Many of our ancestors cited external influences: drugged arrows, spells, planetary forces, charms, potions..

A medieval recipe for a "true-love powder" states: "Take elecampane, the seeds and flowers of vervain, and the berries of mistletoe.. Beat them, after being well dried in an oven, into a powder, and give it to the party you design upon in a glass of wine and it will work wonderful effect to your advantage.."

But Galen, the 2nd-century Greek "prince of physicians", insisted that the affliction was purely a matter of internal chemistry.. It's what happens, he asserted, when the crucial four bodily fluids, or humours — yellow bile, black bile, phlegm and blood — get into a muddle.. For Galen's followers, right down to Robert Burton, author of The Anatomy of Melancholy, the theory of humoralism held good.. Galen was eventually displaced by 19th-century theories of cell biology, but modern physiologists nevertheless share his broad conviction that romantic love is induced by powerful natural bodily chemicals.. In our own day, the favoured chemical explanation focuses on a molecule called PEA: phenylethylamine, a kind of natural amphetamine that revs up the brain and the central nervous system.. PEA causes the experience of euphoria, hyperventilation, increased heart rate, dilated pupils, and secretions of odors that can seduce an unsuspecting love object.. The eye of the chemical storm is in the brain..

The brain in romantic love resembles a huge geological and meteorological event: earthquakes, cyclones, tsunamis.. It's as if the ecosystem of the lover's brain, the pulsing grey-blue-green planet in the skull, suffers a drastic depletion of the protective cortical ozone layer, triggering neuronal global warming with consequent atmospheric storms..

The notion that reason goes to pot in romantic love fits with a popular mind-brain theory first proposed in the 1970s.. The outer brain, or cortex, which evolved late in evolution, is associated with rational thought and intelligence.. The midbrain, known as the limbic system, regulates the emotions.. But there's a deep inner core, located at the final bulb where the spinal cord enters the brain where lurk our darker, primeval, instinctive behaviors of territoriality, mating and reward-seeking..

But whether the nature of romantic love is revealed by nurture rather than nature, by evolution rather than hormones, psychodynamics rather than behaviourism, there are significant lessons to be learnt from the science of statistics.. Divorces, steadily on the increase these past five decades, now run at a rate of more than 50% in the highly concentrated residential districts of the southeast of England. The figures do not include the failed heterosexual partnerships that never reached marriage, nor homosexual partnerships, but the statistics reinforce the message that we should be sceptical about romantic love as a prelude to lasting love.. And yet, statistics also reveal that, despite the scepticism, marriages are on the increase, at a rate of about 2% per annum.. The notion that romantic love is worth it, that it can transform to permanent attachment, is not only far from dead, it is evidently alive and well and thriving..

At a conference on love held about 30 years ago in the US, the delegates agreed that romantic love should be defined as "a cognitive-affective state characterized by intrusive and obsessive fantasizing concerning reciprocity of amorant feelings by the object of the amorance".. That, of course, is the problem of seeking to understand romantic love in clunking scientific language.. Science tells us much that is interesting about love.. But to describe what it is really like to fall in love, subjectively, personally, and to understand why we continue to embark on its exciting, as well as painful and hazardous, journey, we must turn to other kinds of human discourse: poetry, fiction, memoir, and real-life experience..

Lovesick?

So deeply affected by love as to be unable to act normally.. I awake every morning, thinking on her, having dreamt of her all night, the pain of separation searing your heart every time a site or smell brings back the memory of your last encounter.. Daydreaming, drawing hearts in the sand, constantly thinking "I wish she's here so I could share this moment" even when pulling weeds or walking around.. The consuming fire within the heart for even one more moment with ones love that defies rational thought, knowing full well, one moment would never be enough, yearning for eternity together..

The close relationship between the two might help modern day doctors in both their diagnoses and treatments..

I feel that lately, I've been quite fatigued.. Even though I had a total of 9 hours of sleep.. It maybe due to the hypoglycemia but then, does hypoglycemia cause fever? I've done some googling and here's some of the interesting facts I've found...

Lovesickness has its own symptoms, such as insomnia, depression, loss of appetite, loss of interest in everyday life and work, obsessive thoughts, mental intrusions and a frequent inclination to cry..

Then comes the bigger question, am I really lovesick? I'm not saying that I'm thinking of her all the time, but there are times when my mind would fill up with unanswered questions.. And they are not entirely about her as well!

Actually, it might be better this way.. I know I just couldn't sit around and do nothing.. As a question pops up in my mind, if they are not other people related, I would just simply google it up, and find deeper understanding about it.. Once I understand what it is all about, my worries, my insecurities are gone..

Here's some of the symptoms of Lovesickness...

Clammy Hands

Clammy hands and dry mouth are a sign of being love sick.. The body's nervous system goes haywire--too much moisture in the hands, too little moisture in the mouth..

Preoccupation

When the lover is not nearby, the love sick person will feel bereft, depressed, moody, tearful, anxious and preoccupied.. The love sick person will experience loss of appetite..

Rapid Heartbeat

Upon seeing the lover, rapid heartbeat is usually paired with a rush of emotion in the chest.. The pumping of the heart can cause blushing in the face and neck..

Confusion

Confusion may occur when the lover is nearby.. Stuttering, staring and clumsiness are all aspects of this symptom..

Symptom Duration

Despite its intensity, love sickness is a passing state of mind, lasting anywhere from a few days, to a few months.. It's difficult to retain the intense level of emotion that love sickness awakens in the body--usually the feelings lead the lover to either express her feelings and reduce the anxiety, or as time passes, the feelings lose their power as the reality of getting to know the real person takes away from the fantasy..

Doubts...

I've been having insecurities for the last few days.. My instinct is saying to let go... But my heart is saying to stay.. Even though it's hurting... As for my mind, it's been saying.. I have to follow this through the end.. Words I've said.. I must comply.. I'm not one who would simply make promises and giving up before it has really ended.. My principle.. My beliefs.. And my pride..

Though my heart aches so much, I still can't stop thinking about it.. I would really like to make things work.. Nothing is as important anymore..

Arghhh.. Being an optimist can sometimes be a pain in the ass.. Despite that, I know that things will work out in the end.. one way or another...