Thursday, April 3, 2008

Hey..

Hey.. Do u remember..? The day I met you was the first day I started living.. That was it.. That was where it all started.. Then I saw you again the next day.. We were classmates.. I knew in an instant that you were the girl I had seen the day before.. As chance had it, I found out u lived very close to me.. Because I wanted to be together with you, I told you everything about me.. You listened closely to what I had to say.. You even told me your past secrets.. Come to think of it, that might have been the moment.. The moment that I fell for you.. Our relationship and our dates.. I didn't mind any of it.. There was a part of me that was really excited about it.. But I'd never felt that way before, so I had no idea... It was the same when you went out with some other guy.. I felt frustrated, lonely and hopeless at that time.. When you care for me, that was when I thought we had really connected.. That we were going to move forward together.. I really believed it.. Honest..

Our date in genting was fun too.. I had planned on spending the whole time having fun with you, but one thing happened after another.. I was overjoyed when you confessed to me that you loved me.. And when you kissed me, I was so happy that I wanted to start crying like a baby.. And as that feeling came, I thought to myself that I didn't want to be parted from you.. No, I hated even the thought of being separated from you.. When I led u on, I realized that you still have feelings for me.. And from there, things got so crazy I had no idea what was going on..

I'm sorry about that guy.. I was only thinking of myself.. The same with all ur friends.. When I was alone in my room, I was thinking, if only your friends would understand how I feel.. In spite of that, I told you that I hate you even though I love you.. Even though I love you so much.. I love you Azizah.. A whole lot.. So, please, come back to me.. We've decided that we would walk forward together, right? If you were to find another you love, what would happen to me.. I can't move anymore.. I can't go anywhere.. I can't even do anything without thinking of you..

In reality, there are some things that just don't have a correct answer.. Things that you can't do anything about.. There is no way that every people can be happy.. Why not? Because happiness corrupts people.. They get used to the happiness they've found, and seek even more happiness.. People were awfully greedy.. That's why I think people have the emotion called "sadness".. Even thought they contradict each other, people need to be sad to understand happiness..

Guess I have to be sad first before I can understand true happiness.. Only time will heal my pain...

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